Welcome To The Team
by Batmanskipper
Summary: An accomplished agent under investigation, a living weapon, an insane soldier who killed his team, and a very confused junior analyst. Any guesses as to who they are?
1. QHC-1

"So, is the investigation over?" Skipper asked sceptically. The panel of senior officers, charged with investigating the disappearance of his team remained motionless.

"Yes. Do you have anything to say, before we give our verdict?" Special agent Mason asked, his face emotionless.

"So I'm guilty already." The accused penguin countered dryly.

"Is that your official statement?"

"Cut the mackerel, Mason. You know that wasn't. Give it to me strait. What's the verdict?"

"Acquitted," Mason stood up, his expression giving no indication as to whether he agreed with the verdict, "Meeting adjourned."

* * *

"Your assignment is to transport the weapon to experimental station D." Mason handed Skipper a large envelope, "Passports, driver's license, $500 in multiple currencies, the usual."

"Thank you, sir," the penguin accepted the envelope, not even bothering to check the contents; he'd done it all before, "Isn't experimental station D under siege?"

"Yes, some cult leader. Goes by the name of Savio."

"Why don't you just send in a couple of tanks?"

"And have a huge diplomatic hullabaloo? No, the new weapon is far less, obvious." The two penguins were driving one of the base's jeeps towards a small, very well hidden compound.

"So when do I pick my team?"

"You're going solo on this one."

"What happened to "never swim alone?"

"You aren't. The weapon will keep you company." Skipper was starting to get suspicions, but knew better than to ask questions. His position was precarious enough. The two penguins climbed out of the car and walked towards a heavily guarded entrance. After their IDs had been verified, the soldiers stood aside, allowing the two penguins to pass.

Skipper found himself in a large concrete room. There were two doors, one of which had been left ajar, revealing a laboratory. The other was solid steel. Mason entered a pass code, and the door slid open to reveal... a child?

"So he's the weapon?" Skipper asked motioning towards the child seemingly unaffected by the 'weapon's' age. The room was plain, a few books, a desk, and a bed on which the child sat, staring at the visitors. It was obvious he didn't have many.

"Have you ever heard of something called the Quantum Hyper-Cute?" Mason asked.

"No."

"Well it's a good thing you haven't, because it's top secret. Essentially, what this kid can do is reach a level of 132% cuteness. That's a level at which any anyone or anything alive can be knocked out, by an overload of sheer cuteness. We're trying to see if we can get it up to 184%, which would be fatal."

"Is there any way to prevent him from using it against me?"

"As far as we know, there isn't. However, the kid has questions about using his gift. He often needs… persuasion, if you know what I mean. That's why we picked you. If anyone can change his views, or at least keep him scared enough that he won't ask questions, it's you."

"You still think I killed Manfridi, Johnson and the rest of the camp?" Skipper asked, "How many times have to tell you to investigate Rico. I saw him kill Manfridi and Johnson. If I didn't know better..."

"Focus on the mission at hand."

"I want my name cleared, not just officially..."

"Stop obsessing over the matter."

* * *

Skipper and the weapon had driven about five miles from the base before the older penguin finally spoke.

"What's your name?" Skipper asked, glancing at his passenger.

"QHC-1, sir." The younger penguin responded without making eye contact.

"No I meant your real name. Like Henry or Jack."

"I don't know, sir."

"You mean you don't know you're own name?" skipper asked, a hint of surprise in his voice, though he kept his eyes on the road.

"Yes sir. They..."

"I didn't ask why, soldier," the older penguin interrupted, "Well, I can't call you QHC-1," Skipper paused, thinking of a suitable name, "You know, I've always wanted to have a Private. You can be my Private, for now. Consider this a field promotion."

"Thank you, sir."

"You can call me Skipper."

"Yes Skippah, sir."

"What's with the fake accent?" The penguin had only just realised it.

"It's not fake, sir. I'm English."

"Like herring you are. Still, if it amuses you."

* * *

By the next day, the two penguins were on a plane headed for a classified location in the jungles of South America. Private was starting to warm to the Skipper, who was extremely friendly compared to the scientists and guards who were all the company he had back at the base. Now half way through the journey, Private had stopped speaking in only "yes sir" and "no sir." However, he was still wary, and chose his words with care.

Private didn't want to leave the plane. He hadn't been out of the base since they brought him there as a little kid and suddenly being transported to a strange land wasn't exactly taking things one step at a time.

"No! I won't go out there!" The penguin desperately gripped the seat; his eyes wide with fear. Skipper glared at him.

"My job to transport a weapon, not babysit. If you think for one minute, I'm going to humour your little childish fears..." Without warning Skipper slapped the younger penguin across the face, so hard he lost his grip on the seat, and sprawled into the floor, "I don't have time for this." Skipper grabbed Private by the wing and dragged him out of the plane and out onto the tarmac of the small hidden airstrip. The pilot and some of the other penguins in the vicinity gave horrified looks, but said nothing.

* * *

Private sat with his ear to the door. He could just make out what was being said in the corridor outside.

"Of all the missions I could have been given I get stuck with this one." Skipper grumbled. Private could hear him pacing the floor.

"Skipper, he's only a child. He can't be much more than eleven." An unfamiliar voice replied.

"He's a soldier now." There was a pause before Skipper changed the subject, "Did you get the information?"

"Rico's been located." There was a scuffle of papers.

"Good," The door opened before Private had a chance to dive out of the way, the door catching the younger penguins on the side of the face, which was already sore from when Skipper had slapped him earlier. Private let out a moan of pain. Skipper immediately grabbed the younger penguin's wing, pulling him roughly to his feet, "Never listen to another person's conversation unless I tell you to. Understood?" He growled, suddenly seeming even scarier than he had before.

"Yes sir." Private squeaked. Skipper tossed him a backpack.

"We're leaving."


	2. Unexpected Reactions

" A SNAKE!" Private screamed.

"So, Its a snake, I wouldn't be worried unless it was a poisonous one." Skipper replied without taking his eyes of the map.

"ANOTHER SNAKE"

"Shut up already... Okay, thats a poisonous one. Try not to panic, we're almost there." The two penguins avoided the snake.

"Sir, who's Rico, and why are we going to see him?"

"'It's not a good idea to ask questions. I had hoped you'd noticed that already."

"But, Skippah, this isn't an official mission." Skipper smiled. Private was getting to be a good agent.

"Okay. This is an unofficial... detour. We're going to see Rico, because I want to... talk to him about something."

"Who is he?"

"Rico... used to be a member of my old team. You may have found this out from listening to me and Mason's conversations, He was responsible for the murder of my entire team.

"What happened?" Skipper stared off into space.

"It was so... sudden... unexpected. One day, he went into the armory, grabbed a couple of machine guns killed everyone in the whole base and... and... he let me live," Skipper knelt down at the edge of the trees at the side of the trail, binoculars in hand, "... I don't know why." Private didn't know what to do. He wanted to comfort Skipper, but knew that would only make him feel weak. In the end Private opted to simply sit in silence. Skipper was one of those people who needed to come to terms with themselves, before he could do anything else.

They were at the edge of a small cliff overlooking what looked like a small hut. If the information he had received was correct, this was where Rico was holed up, leaving him to face investigation. Skipper put the binoculars down and pulled something out of his bag and began to assemble it.

"Whats that, Skippah?" Private asked, eying the various pieces of the strange object.

"Haven't you ever seen a rifle before?" Skipper gave the child a puzzled look, "Oh..." Skipper remembered Private hadn't left the base since he was a little kid. He probably hadn't even seen a zoo in real life.

"But I thought you were going to talk to him?"

"Guess what, I lied. Most people in this business do." Skipper lay on his stomach gun trained on the entrance of the hut, waiting for Rico to appear. After fifteen minutes the penguin stepped out the door.

"Skippah, is this really the right thing to do?" Private asked. So these were the ethical concerns Mason had mentioned.

"He killed most of my unit, not to mention he's a danger to himself and everyone around him. I'd say this is my moral duty!"

"Are you sure?" Skipper took a worn photograph out of his pocket. It showed four penguins, all in military uniform. Private recognized the one in the middle as Skipper and the one on the far left as the man Skipper called Rico. Skipper pointed to the two men on the right.

"Those two were my best friends, Manfridi and Johnson. We grew up in the same enclosure, we went to the same academy, we served in the same team," Skipper pointed to the man on the far left, "He killed them. Along with most of my friends. We were all in that base. He killed them too. I don't care if he has an insanity defense. He's dead."

Private thought about this for a moment.

"You know what they said to my parents when they took me away? They said the same thing you did. That I was a danger to myself and everyone else around me. Thats why they called me a weapon. Thats why they locked me up. If he's so dangerous could be a useful weapon, just like me." Private was almost certain that would get Skipper to change his mind. Everyone at the base seemed so obsessed with getting their hands on anything that could possibly be a weapon. Skipper shook his head.

"He's not like you. He can't be controlled."

"Neither can I." Private slammed into Skipper, knocking the gun from his flippers. Skipper glared at him. Private jumped up as fast as he could, attempting to grab the gun, but Skipper was faster. Skipper wrenched the gun from Private's hands. By now they were precariously close to the edge of the cliff. The younger penguin stumbled, but regained his balance.

"I won't let you kill another penguin." Private held his ground. His heels were almost over the edge of the cliff. Skipper slapped him across the face, harder than he intended. Private stumbled backwards onto... nothing?

"PRIVATE!" Skipper screamed at the boy's unconscious form as he climbed down the edge of the cliff, oblivious of the fact that Rico was also headed towards the boy. Skipper knelt beside Private, assessing the injuries. Rico shoved him out of the way.

"Don't you dare hurt him!" Skipper shouted at the man kneeling over the injured boy, holding a knife.

"Ou' of 'ay," Rico ordered. Skipper pointed his handgun at the seemingly insane penguin.

"Step away from Private!" Rico turned around, glaring at him. Then he sighed, there was no reasoning with Skipper once he got angry. Rico regurgitated a baseball bat and hit him over the head with it. Skipper collapsed onto the grass.

Skipper awoke to find himself lying on a hammock in the cabin he had seen through his binoculars. It was dark outside. He must have been out a few hours. Skipper stumbled out of the cabin and towards the figure cooking something over a fire.

"Where's Private? What did you do to him?!" Skipper demanded as the figure turned around.

"ge'in' 'ire wo'd." Rico replied. Skipper grabbed the other penguin holding him over the fire.

"Where is he?" Skipper demanded again.

"Hello Skippah, are you feeling better now?" Private was now illuminated by the fire. He was carrying a bundle of fire wood.

"Private, that knife..."

"There was a stone embedded in my wing. It had to be removed and dressed before I lost too much blood. I'm just glad I was unconscious for that part." Rico pushed Skipper off.

"I 'old oo 'o," Rico replied smugly as he lifted the pot from above the fire, "Feeeeeeeesh!"


	3. Control

Rico tossed Private a fish. However before he could swallow it Skipper snatched it out of his wing.

"Don't eat the fish, Private! It might be poisoned!" Skipper shouted as he scrutinized the fish.

"Skippah, why would he poison me after saving me?" Private replied somewhat bewildered by Skipper's irrational behavior.

"Don't talk back"

"Yes, sir." Skipper went to slap the younger bird but Rico stepped in front of him.

"No." He grunted. Skipper was just about to explode with rage when he realized just how unlike the Rico he planned to kill those actions were.

"Skippah, why don't you listen to Rico's side of the story?" Private asked.

"Fine. Talk." Immediately Rico sprung up from where he was seated on the floor. He made motion like he was eating something. Skipper did his best to translate.

"You were eating fish?" Skipper guessed. Rico shook his head, motioning that the object was far smaller.

"Walnuts?" No again. Rico shook his head as if to say the object in question was not allowed.

"Red lychee nuts!? Rico, those are illegal!"

"Um, Skippah, what are red lychee nuts?" Private asked. Rico looked at the younger penguin quizzically.

"He's a weapon, Rico. They don't tell him stuff like that," Skipper explained, "Anyway, red lychee nuts were found on an expedition to Madagascar. They were quite popular with the local lemur population, as in small doses, it gives the user a rush of confidence and increases physical strength. In larger doses, it completely takes over the person's mind, amplifying aggression to the extreme. This drives the user completely insane for a limited amount of time, unless an even larger amount is ingested, in which case the insanity is permanent. However, the person is never able to account for their actions while they were under the influence of the red lychee nut. Rico, just how many did you eat?" Rico grabbed a stick and scratched six lines into the floor.

"Well that explains things. After eating that many its strange the effects weren't... oh, tuna..." Skipper grabbed Private and started pulling him away from the campfire.

"I ca' control i," Rico shouted after him. Skipper looked at him sceptically, still standing between him and Private.

"Skippah, if he couldn't control it, neither of us would still be here." Private had a point. He sat down in front of the fire, for once ignoring the fact that Private had proven him wrong.

_You're a weapon, nothing more. _

"No! I'm a penguin!" Private screamed back at his dream, all the while knowing there was some truth to this. He had been robbed of his childhood, never treated like a real penguin. They had even renamed him like a weapon: QHC-1.

_I wonder if your parents still miss their little weapon. I'd say they'd be pretty glad to part with you after that tiny little incident where you put the entire town to sleep for eight hours._

"It was an accident! I didn't know I could do that! It just happened..."

_Imagine how embarrassed they were to explain the fact their son was a freak. I suppose the entire town refused to talk to them after you were taken away in a cage. Look how much suffering you've brought on everyone who's ever cared for you._

Rico was just walking past for a drink of water when he heard Private talking to himself. The young penguin was tossing and turning, seemingly begging the forgiveness of a person in his dream.

"Mom, dad, I'm so sorry. It's all my fault..." Rico shook him awake. Privates eyes snapped open, wide with fear, "I'm so sorry..." Then he noticed Rico. He jumped out of bed and stood to attention. Regardless of the fact Skipper still wary of the penguin, he was a senior officer. Rico motioned for him to sit down.

"Wha' wrong?" He asked. Private sat back down in the hammock, clinging to his covers.

"I'm really sorry, sir, I shouldn't have woken you..."

"Ba' dream?" Rico asked. Private nodded.

"Do you ever get bad dreams?" Private asked. Rico nodded. Then he thought for a few seconds, before regurgitating something. It was a plastic toy, shaped like a brightly colored unicorn.

"Lunicorn," He grunted. Private accepted the toy, hugging it like the child he was supposed to be. Rico smiled, with a tinge of sadness, memory's flooding back to him.

"Thank you, sir."

"goo' night," Private settled back to sleep.

Skipper was about to drag Private out of bed as usual, when he noticed the lunicorn. He recognized it. Immediately Skipper shook Rico awake. He pointed to Private.

"Is that...?" Skipper began to ask. Rico nodded.

"Was sister's," Rico regurgitate a photograph of him and an eight year old girl.

"I thought she was evacuated via the base... Oh... She wasn't in the base when..." Rico nodded, taking another look at the photograph, before swallowing it again. He couldn't allow himself emotions. The sadness always turned to anger, something he couldn't risk.

"Ba' dream. Make 'etter." He grunted. Skipper nodded. He understood. Skipper allowed Private to sleep another fifteen minutes. Maybe Rico did have control.

After the three penguins had finished their breakfast, Rico regurgitated a map of the area.

"Here's the plan. We return to the airbase for supplies. Then we drive along experimental station D's supply route till we get to here," Skipper pointed at a point half way down the road on the map, "We can't take the road all the way, the enemy would spot us. From this point on, we swim down stream, and through the base's water supply pipes. That should get us through without our presence being detected." Skipper stood up. Private raised his wing.

"Will Rico be coming with us?" Private asked. Skipper considered this for a few seconds.

"I think I may have misjudged his ability to control the effects of the red lychee's nuts, and, like you said, he's a powerful weapon." Skipper hated admitting he was wrong. Private smiled.


	4. Field Promotions

**Sorry about the mix up. Its not humanized. I know I've been making a lot of mistakes, I think it's because I'm writing a humanized story at the same time. I plan on going back and removing the mistakes from previous chapters.**

When Private, Rico and Kowalski climbed out of the river just outside the base, they were met by Brigadier General Hill.

"Do you have the weapon?" Hill asked.

"Private, step forward." Skipper ordered.

"You named the weapon without authorization?"

"Well, was I supposed to call the kid, QHC-1?"

"It's not a kid, it's a weapon," Private cringed, "Take QHC-1 to lab 54. You know your way around the base?"

"Yes, sir. QHC-1 fall in line." Skipper ordered. Private remained frozen. Skipper slapped him. Private stumbled, regaining his balance before falling in behind Rico.

"Skipper."

"Yes, sir." Skipper turned around.

"I assume you have brought ex-Second Lieutenant Rico in for questioning?"

"No sir. He's part of the team."

* * *

The team entered lab 54. Immediately they were met by a young penguin, who's feather's looked unusually singed, as if an invention he had been working on had spontaneously exploded.

"I'm, Kowalski, sir. My superior, Special Agent Allen is waiting in the lab. Do you have the weapon?" Kowalski reported.

"Yes we have the weapon." Skipper shoved Private forward.

"Hello, Kowalski." Private politely extended a flipper. Skipper slapped him.

"I... I had no idea... A child was the weapon..." Kowalski stuttered taking a few steps back.

"Get over it." Skipper interrupted.

"Yes sir." Kowalski led the way to an office just inside the lab. He knocked. The door opened. Inside was a tall and slightly lanky penguin sitting at a desk. Skipper made the assumption he was Special Agent Allen.

"So, this is the QHC-1," Allen stood up from behind his desk, "Kowalski, tell the lab boys to run the usual tests then get him on the front line. I want those crazy snake cult people dead by tomorrow." The phone wrang. Special Agent Allen listened for a few seconds before slamming the phone on its receiver.

"Sir?" Skipper asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Skip the tests. Kowalski, get Skipper and the weapon up to the top of the building. The enemy's in position. We need that hypercute now!"

* * *

Private stood on the roof of the base, overlooking the battle below. Fortunately, it hadn't occurred to any of the snakes storming the base to look up, otherwise he, Kowalski and the team would be dead.

"Alright Private, do that hypercute thing." Skipper ordered. Private shrunk back from the edge of the roof.

"No."

"What do you mean, no?" Skipper replied.

"I won't do it. I'm not a weapon." Private turned his back to the battle below. Skipper slapped him. Private winced, but refused to move, "I don't care what you do. I don't even care if you kill me. I'm not a weapon." Skipper shoved Private dangerously close to the edge, forcing him to look at the scene below.

"What do you see down there? Those snakes are viciously attacking our brothers. Private, those soldiers down there have families! Do you really want to let them die? Where's you're loyalty?"

"Those snakes down there have families."

"You aren't going to kill them. You're just knocking them out."

"So you can kill them." Skipper slapped him so hard the younger penguin screamed in pain. That was a bad move. The snakes below looked up. Skipper only just pulled Private away from the edge as the first wave of spears, arrows and other projectiles were fired.

"Evasive!" Skipper shouted. Rico was down on his belly immediately. Kowalski and Private simply stood there, stunned. Rico knocked them over before the second wave hit. Skipper belly slid to the door that led to the base below. The third wave hit. Immediately Skipper ordered them inside. Just as the door shut behind them Skipper heard someone, certainly not a penguin, shout: "Ready explosive catapult!"

"Hover dam! Men, we are getting out of here now!" Skipper ordered the three other penguins.

"We are going to stand our ground!" Brigadier General Hill shouted running towards them.

"With all due respect general, they have an explosive catapult! We need to evacuate before they hit a fuel reserve." Skipper replied.

"Then I will die with honor along side my men."

"If you get out now, then your men won't be dead." The Brigadier General drew his gun, pointing it at Skipper.

"I will not have deserters on my base," Skipper raised his hands in surrender. Hill pulled a remote control from his pocket and pressed the single button.

"Emergency containment protocols: Engaged" A computer voice announced.

"Rico, flamethrower me!" The Brigadier general never knew what hit him.

* * *

The four penguins belly slid towards the base's exit, racing the fire that threatened to envelop them. They made it out just as the doors slid shut behind him. Skipper climbed over the no longer electrified fence and dived for cover behind a large rock, the other's following suit. The catapult must have hit the fuel storage center because the building suddenly exploded burning debris falling from the sky. The enemy continued to fire on the already defeated base. Luckily, the four escapees hadn't been spotted. Kowalski buried his head in his hands. He'd only been in the military a few months, the whole time that base had been his home.

"Get your act together, soldier!" Skipper shouted in Kowalski's face.

"For mackerel's sake! I'm only a low level analyst!" Kowalski shouted as the base he had previously worked in burned, turning the sky a bright orange.

"Well, congratulations on your promotion Lieutenant Kowalski." Skipper replied.

"But... But.." Kowalski stammered.

"So, should I promote the psycho who could snap at any moment, or would you prefer the ten year old who's currently clinging to his lunicorn for dear life." Skipper replied sarcastically.

"I see your point." Kowalski snapped.

"So you're an analyst. Start analyzing."


	5. Drastic Measures

"Well, there's approximately 2,000 enemy foot soldiers, 125 archers, 3 catapults..." Kowalski reported.

"Over there!" Someone in the distance shouted. Immediately everyone was on their feet.

"I've got eyes, Kowalski. Give me some options!" skipper was nervous now. He didn't need to hear the statistics to work out how long they would last in a fight against an entire army.

"Well, I would suggest that we use Private's quantum hyper-cute to temporarily stun the enemy. Then we run like crazy." Skipper considered this.

"Private, hyper-cute!"

"No. The answer is still no." Private replied stubbornly.

"Rico, deadly weapon please." Rico tossed Skipper his favorite flamethrower. Skipper slapped private across the face getting his attention. He pointed it at Private.

"Private. Use the hyper-cute now, or I will kill you. Its that simple," Private shrunk away, clinging tighter to his lunicorn, "I'm going to count to three. One..."

"Shoot," Private looked up at Skipper, "I told you. I won't do it."

"Two..."

"I won't use it." Kowalski whispered something to Rico. Immediately Rico grabbed Skipper from behind, hold him in a deadly headlock.

"Lets change the stakes," Kowalski motioned to Skipper, who was struggling desperately against the bigger penguin's iron grip, "You don't get us out of here, and Rico kills Skipper." It took a few seconds for Private to process this.

"I'll do it, but I will never use it again."

* * *

The four penguins walked strait through the battle field, Private hyper-cuteing anyone who offered resistance. He hated every second of the journey. Finally, every single one of the snakes who had been attacking the fort was either unconscious or dead. He really was a powerful weapon. The team walked towards a jeep left behind by the enemy, Rico never releasing his grip on Skipper, who was going slightly blue. Finally they were there. Without warning, Skipper grabbed Rico's wing and flipped him over his shoulder, displaying that he could, in fact, have escaped that hold easily at any point.

"Kowalski, that was an extremely reckless course of action, not to mention completely disregarding the chain of command!" Skipper shouted at the taller penguin, "I like you already." Skipper smiled.

"Thank you sir." Kowalski replied. Skipper had him worried for a few seconds. The team climbed into the jeep. Rico went strait for the driver's seat.

"Don't even think about it," Rico shrunk back sheepishly. Skipper grabbed the wheel, Rico stood by the accelerator, and Kowalski by the break.

* * *

Private was fast asleep when he was dragged out of his tent in the middle of the night. When the jeep ran out of fuel the team had set up camp in a nearby field. It was pitch dark. Private struggled against his captor as he was dragged by his foot through the muddy grass and away from his tent. Somewhere along the way he dropped the lunicorn, which he hadn't stopped holding since the base exploded. Suddenly the ground beneath him disappeared and he found himself in the cold waters of the nearby stream. This woke him up. He panicked for a few seconds then, judging by the direction the waist high water was flowing in, half swam and half ran towards the edge. Just when he found himself on dry land he was pushed back in.

"Are you awake now?" He heard skipper demand. He looked around. At first he had thought the night was unusually dark, but then he realized there was something on his face. He pulled it off. He had been blindfolded. It was dark, but not that dark. He spotted Skipper and Rico standing by the edge of the stream. Private shivered.

"Skippah? What's going on?" Private was on the verge of tears.

"Just making sure you were awake for early morning training. Out of the river. Fall in line." Private obeyed his instructions.

"Skipper, what time is it?" Private asked suppressing a yawn.

"2300."

"Its not even morning?!"

"Don't talk back," Skipper slapped him across the face, "I've decided that you are in need of some extra training. Especially when it comes to obeying orders. Now, deploy hyper-cute!"

"No." Private did nothing.

"Have it your way. You will train, all night, every night until you learn to obey orders without question. Am I understood? Rico, commence jumping jacks. I'll take over at 0100." Skipper walked off into the darkness.

Private hadn't slept in two days. Several times, throughout Skipper's deliberately long briefings he had started to fall asleep, but was always awoken with a painful slap. Once again night came, and instead of following the other penguins to bed he followed Skipper to the field where Kowalski was waiting. Once again, Skipper started with the same command.

"Private, hyper-cute!" Private collapsed out of sheer exhaustion.

"Please, Skipper. I have to sleep!" For the first time in weeks, despite the various difficult situations, he cried. Skipper turned his back on the child.

"Kowalski, walk with me," Skipper began to walk towards the road, Kowalski following, "I need you're honest opinion. Am I doing the right thing?"

"You're torturing a child. How could you possibly think thats the right thing?!" Kowalski replied. Skipper began to study the grass.

"He disobeyed orders. His inaction cost the lives of hundreds of fellow penguins. I have to teach him to obey orders. I don't like it Kowalski. I don't think I like doing this to him, but it has to be done." Kowalski stopped walking. Skipper stopped as well, surprised. He turned around.

"Skipper, some of the people in Experimental Station D were my best friends, so if anyone feels the loss its me, but you need a reality check. Stop thinking of Private as a soldier and think of him as what he really is: a ten year old who was taken from his parents at a young age, stripped of his identity and taught that he was nothing more than a weapon."

"But..."

"With all due respect sir, shut up and listen. You can't avenge the deaths of the men in Experimental Station D by ruining an already messed up boy's life to cover your own guilt. I know you need to deliver results, but I think we've hit immovable object meets unstoppable force. Why don't you try to come to a compromise?"

"Kowalski?"

"Sir?"

"Thank you," Skipper walked back to where Private and Rico were training, "Go to bed Private. We'll talk in the morning." Private walked towards the tent warily, assuming Skipper was just trying to get his hopes up. He waited for Skipper to give the order to return. The order never came.

* * *

Private ate his breakfast, or by now lunch, in silence. He had allowed him to sleep in until noon. Skipper sat down beside him.

"I'm sorry." Private looked up. Had he just heard what he thought he had?

"Sir?"

"I shouldn't have done that, Private. If you don't want to use the hyper-cute I won't force you. All I want to know is you object to using your ability."

"I... I'm worried its going to be abused. I'm afraid people won't use it to save lives, but to kill." Private waited for the inevitable slap.

"I wish I could say I understand your position, but that would be lying. Why don't we make an agreement? I won't force you to use the hyper-cute unless its absolutely necessary. By that I mean if there is no other option."

"We've been through this before. You'd just kill them after I knock them out."

"I promise that I, and anyone else on my team, won't kill anyone you use the hyper-cute on. Do we have a deal?"

"Yes." For a few minutes the two sat in silence.

"You weren't really going to shoot me, Skippah?" Private asked. Skipper chuckled.

"I guess Kowalski and Rico didn't tell you this, but the safety was on the whole time." Private smiled. He didn't know what a safety was, but it sounded reassuring.


	6. Memory

**This is a double length chapter (approx. 2400 words). I know its a bit long, but I couldn't think of a way to divide it in two.  
**

"We're done, boys," Skipper spoke solemnly, "We failed, thats true, but there's nothing more we can do." Skipper looked at his team. They weren't the best trained, the strongest, or the smartest, well, thats debatable, but he wouldn't trade them for any other team in the world. The sun was up and the team had just finished their breakfast. The team had now been camped there six days; Skipper had stayed longer than he had intended to give Private time to recover.

"Sir, don't we need to finish off Savio before he attacks again?" Kowalski asked.

"There's another team working on that. Our job is to bring Private back to HQ." Private flinched. It was no secret that the youngest penguin did not relish the thought of returning to the endless tests and experiments that awaited him back at the HQ. Rico swallowed the tents and other supplies they wanted to bring with them, then the penguins set off down the road, walking as Rico was unable to regurgitate gasoline.

* * *

"Sir, we're going the wrong way. We should have turned left onto the next trail," Kowalski pointed out. Skipper was staring off into space, "Sir?" Skipper snapped back to reality. He had been strangely silent for the last half of the journey.

"No. We aren't going the wrong way. Me and Rico have decided to take a small detour." Skipper replied. Private's brow furrowed.

"I hope its not like the last detour, sir." The younger penguin stated. Skipper shook his head.

"Don't worry, its not like the last detour. Me and Rico, just want to say goodbye."

The team reached another cross roads, or cross trails as they were no longer roads but small dirt paths never more than two meters wide, surrounded by jungle. Skipper didn't need to follow Kowalski's directions. He and Rico knew the way.

"Kowalski, Private, wait here." Skipper ordered. He and Rico continued down the trail until they reached a very large abandoned old fort. The two penguins stopped in front of the main gate, which had been left wide open. For a few seconds the stood there in silence, remembering their fallen team mates. This wasn't just any old abandoned base. It was The Base. Rico stepped forward.

"Rico. You don't have to do this... if it... hurts too much." Skipper told his fellow teammate. Rico walked inside, Skipper following.

"Wa' 'appned?" He asked. Skipper drew a deep breath.

"I don't think..."

"I need oo know," Rico wasn't going to take no for an answer. Now Skipper was leading, through the long since abandoned halls and into the armory. There he stopped just outside the entrance.

"I'll tell you what happened," Skipper walked down the hall a bit further. In front of him was an old and extremely moldy whiteboard, "I was standing right here, looking at this notice board when you walked up to me."

"_Skipper, I need access to the armory again." you told me._

"_Why?" I asked. By then I had finished writing the notice and had turned around, giving you my full attention._

"_I'm out of flamethrowers, sir. I know I only just restocked yesterday, but me and Johnson were doing some target practice. You can guess what happened to my spares."_

"_You blew them up again, didn't you? Okay, I'll let you restock, just this once," I put the marker down and we walked down the hallway until we came to the armory door. _

Skipper retraced his steps, lost in thought. He held his hand to the now barely recognizable flipper print scanner that used to control the armory door.

"_Flipper print: recognized." An automated voice announced as the doors slid open._

"_MANFRIDI," I shouted. Manfridi charged down the hallway and stood to attention in front of me, "I need you to supervise Rico, while he restocks his flamethrowers. I going to send a message to headquarters, so you're supervising him."_

"_But, Skipper..." Manfridi protested. I had probably interrupted the game of backgammon he and Johnson had every evening._

"_Regulation 754: Any penguin accessing the armory must be supervised by at least one commissioned officer." I quoted. Manfridi sighed. I left you two alone and walked towards the radio room._

Rico blew open the doors of the armory, which had rusted shut. Skipper walked in. The forensics team had washed away the bloodstains and removed the bodies months ago, but Skipper knew their locations all too well.

"I wasn't here when this happened, so I'm going on what the forensic reports told me and how I think Manfridi and Johnson would have reacted." Skipper figured he knew Lieutenant Manfridi and Private Johnson well enough to make a pretty accurate guess as to what happened.

_Manfridi stood outside the armory door._

"_Alright, be quick." He told you impatiently. You walked into the armory, but instead of heading towards the flamethrowers, went towards the high explosives and machine guns._

"_Hey, Rico. Those are class four weapons, you can't take them without Skipper signing for them," Manfridi objected. He walked towards you after receiving no reply, "Rico, I can't let you take those" he repeated. Then you turned around, gun in hand and burst into that crazy laughter, specific to people under the influence of red lychee nuts. "What are you..." You shot him at point blanc range before he could finished his sentence. A few seconds later, you heard footsteps. Johnson was running towards you, "I heard gunshots. Another malfunction?" He didn't even live long enough to see Manfridi's body._

Skipper walked away from the part of the armory that once held the machine guns. Then he turned and left, walking down the hallway and up a spiral staircase, which led to the radio room. The radio room was located at the top of one of the old towers. Skipper kicked the door open, which was weak with damp. The room was just as he had last seen it, minus the bodies and radio equipment.

_I was in the radio room when I heard the screams. Naturally I looked out of the window to see what was going on. You can't imagine the mixture of fear and surprise I felt when I saw that most of the guards in the courtyard were either dead or dying. Every so often, there was blur of black and white, after which another guard would drop dead. _

"_Skipper, do you read me?.. Skipper, do you read me." The radio repeated. I had dropped microphone in my surprise, but picked it up again after I had somewhat recovered from the shock._

"_They're... They're all dead... He's killing them..." I stuttered, barely comprehending what I had just seen. _

"_Skipper... Who is killing who. I repeat, who is killing who?" The radio replied._

"_I... I... everyone, except us, in the radio room. I have no visual on the attacker, I repeat, enemy's identity remains unknown. Over" My training kicked in. I suppressed the urge to panic. I had to stay calm._

"_State your..." The transmission was cut off. Someone had jammed the signal. Then I heard noises on the stairway._

"_No... Please don't..." There was a bloodcurdling scream, then the sound of an explosion. I didn't need to be Kowalski to realize the attacker was advancing up the stairs. I locked the door and looked around the room. There were two radio technicians and three other officers. The two radio operators were franticly trying to contact HQ, even though we all knew it was impossible to get a signal through. The three officers, none of which had seen battle before were frozen in shock. Nobody was going to be much help. I grabbed a desk and began to barricade the door, but gave up, knowing it was useless. The attacker had explosives, he would simply blast the door down._

Skipper was in a world of his own. He was crouched behind an overturned desk, reliving the events as he recounted them.

_"All of you, find somewhere to hide." I ordered. The three officers did as they were told. The radio operators continued their futile attempts to contact HQ, "You aren't going to get through, the signals jammed. We only have a few minutes before the enemy comes in here, so find somewhere to hide. Grab anything that can be used as a weapon." There really wasn't any good hiding places, but it was better nothing. I was hiding behind an overturned desk near the door when the it exploded. All I could see was a silhouette of the attacker as he raised his gun, searching the room. The smoke cleared... and that was when I realized it was you. _

Rico grabbed a desk for support. How could he have done such horrible things? If he didn't know Skipper as well as he did he would have turned around and told him he was lying. Skipper noticed this. He stood up from behind the desk, back in the real world.

"I think I should stop." Skipper could tell this was painful for Rico.

"No!" He ordered. The monosyllable came out far more aggressive than he had intended. Skipper scrutinized him for a few seconds, trying to judge if he was still in control. Rico looked him in the eye. Skipper continued, satisfied that Rico wouldn't spontaneously succumb to the red lychee nut's affects.

_Bang. Captain Forrester was dead. I launched himself at you, and managed to knock the gun out of your hand and over to where one of the radio operators was hiding. "Jameson, get the gun!" _I_ shouted at him, but the radio operator simply stood there in shock. I lost my grip when you elbowed me in the stomach. I was stunned for a few seconds, then made a dive for the gun, but you already had it. You pointed at me, causing me to freeze in my tracks. You had you're finger on the trigger and about to shoot when you blinked, then paused as if you heard someone say something for you. _

"_Do it already." I blurted out. Somehow the lack of decision made me angry. You looked at me, with a strange expression I had never seen before. Then you hit me over the head with the gun. The last thing I heard before I lost consciousness was the sound of four shots._

* * *

"I... don't know why you didn't kill me. We were never that close. I was just your commanding officer. It was you and Johnson who were best friends." Skipper asked. He had already pushed Rico to his limits, and instantly regretted the asking question. Rico shook his head.

"oo 'inutes?" He asked. Skipper nodded and left the room. Rico sat down in one of the chairs. His answer to Skipper's question had been a lie. He did know why he spared Skipper's life. Ever since he'd been assigned to that team, he'd liked Skipper. He'd liked Johnson too, but not like that. He had never been able to understand how he liked Skipper, certainly not like a friend. No, that was a lie too. He knew, he just never wanted to admit it, even to himself. The truth was: he was madly in love with his commanding officer.

* * *

Rico stood in one of the dormitories, facing an empty bunk bed, a small object in his hand. There was one last thing he needed to do. He placed the small object on the bullet hole riddled and mold covered mattress. The small object was a DVD of the Lunicorns, season one. That was his sister's favorite season.

"ood eye 'lisabeth. I'm... 'orry." His sister had lent him the disk the day she was evacuated from the nearby village she and Rico's parents were staying in. She had passed him the disk when the team had escorted her group into the base, telling him that she hoped this would cheer him up after he had remarked that life was pretty frustrating there. Skipper had turned a blind eye to this exchange. In hindsight, Rico wished he hadn't. It might have saved her life if she was sent to another base. He just had to be thankful that his parents had already been transferred when he... lost control/

* * *

Rico met Skipper out in the courtyard. It was obvious that simply being in the building was depressing for both penguins. They were about to leave when a voice commanded: "Stop right there, penguins!" Rico and Skipper turned around, to find themselves face to face with none other than Major X, followed by about seven other soldiers, all armed.

"Major X!?" Skipper exclaimed.

"Alright Rico, we have him covered, its safe."

"What?" Rico grunted.

"It's okay Rico, we're here to arrest him."

"On what charge?" Skipper demanded. He could have sworn X had gotten a dishonorable discharge after filing 167 complaints about his team withing two months, which was, beyond all doubt, harassment. He seemed to have some sick obsession with proving that they were enemy agents.

"You'll find out soon enough. Meanwhile, you'll be catching the Xpress strait to prison." Skipper hated those X puns.

Rico stood there defiantly. He was not going to allow his leader to be arrested for a crime he committed. Skipper looked up, then at him. That was the signal to begin concealed conversation method 26c.

"how 'ould oo!" Rico shouted loud enough for X to hear.

"I didn't Rico!" Skipper replied. Then in a quieter voice: "They'll come after you next. As soon as X turns his back on you, run for it. Get the rest of the team and go strait to the airbase. Ask for Captain Williams. Tell him what happened."

"Why 'ipper?" Rico shouted out, then, like Skipper, replied in a lower voice, "Not 'eaving."

"I told you, I'm innocent!" Skipper looked Rico strait in the eye before whispering: "Tell Williams to fly you to New York. He'll arrange for you to be transferred to the Central Park Zoo. There's safe house under the fish bowl in the penguin exhibit. I'll be free in a couple of days, X's charges never stick. Stay at the zoo. Thats an order." Rico nodded. He coughed, secretly regurgitating something into his flipper. He passed it to the other penguin. It was a bug. Skipper immediately hid tiny object in his feathers. Rico walked towards X, following Skipper's instructions to the letter.

**I originally wrote what happened at the base (everything in italic) in the third person, so if it sounds a bit strange in parts, thats why.**


	7. Other Interpretations

"Well, I suppose we just have to wait for them to release him. X's charges never stick." Captain Williams stated. Kowalski, Rico, Private and Williams were seated in the empty mess hall of the airbase.

"I think they're serious. They've taken him to Hoboken." Kowalski replied grimly.

"You're joking? Right?" Williams asked. Kowalski shook his head.

"Hoboken Maximum Security Zoo, New Jersey. Solitary." For a few seconds the group simply sat there, stunned.

"Um... K'walski, what's Hoboken?" Private asked.

"Well, Hoboken is the most secure prison in the world, thus it houses the most dangerous criminals, most of which were put there by Skipper and his original team. That would explain why they put him in solitary. Its for his own protection."

"X is gonna come after you, either with a subpoena or arrest you as accomplices. We need to get you guys out of here," Williams stood up, finishing his coffee, "I can probably hide you in one of the old hangers. I doubt X has any reason to think I'm hiding you..."

"Is there anywhere closer to Hoboken?" Kowalski asked, "Don't worry, we aren't thinking of breaking him out, we just think it'll be easier to gather evidence that way."

"Well, Skipper had an old safe house at the central park zoo, the penguin exhibit to be exact. It'll take me a while to refuel the plane and come up with some kind of story to get clearance from my CO*, but I can do it."

Kowalski lifted the fishbowl that served as an entrance to the safe house. It had taken him a few days to learn his way around the zoo, but the place did have a pretty decent lab... He climbed down the ladder. The base had originally been composed of a large cement room, which contained pretty much nothing but looked like a living room, and a smaller room off to the side that served as a bedroom and thirteen underground storage levels. However, Rico turned out to be a pretty decent interior decorator and had made the base more suitable for a whole team instead of one penguin. He had dug four bunks out of one of the walls in the larger room, added a table and turned the smaller room into a lab for Kowalski. They had pretty much left the lower levels alone. Nobody really wanted to know what was stored down there.

"I called in a few favors with some friends, who were lucky enough to get jobs in some of the senior offices. Don't ask how I managed to get myself posted to the middle of nowhere. Anyway, I've now got a pretty good idea of what the prosecution thinks happened three years ago in Temporary Evacuation Base Y, and it's not pretty. Rico, do you remember an incident that occurred three months before the Skipper allegedly killed everyone in the base?"

_The four penguins slid through the tall grass. They only had a few more miles to go before they got back to base, but darkness was closing fast. They were still in enemy territory, but traveling in the dark would only get them lost. That was the logic behind skipper's decision._

"_Rico, set up some tents, we're stopping for the night." Skipper ordered. The three penguins stopped sliding and stood up. _

"_Yes sir!" Rico replied happily. They'd been belly sliding for hours, and he was glad to have a break. He regurgitated four tents and began to pitch them._

"_You and Manfridi manage to sneak those marshmallows out of the mess hall?" Skipper asked. Johnson held up a big bag of marshmallows. Skipper smiled, "Right, Manfridi, you're on firewood." Manfridi shook his head. _

"_Sorry skipper, but we got the marshmallows..." Manfridi replied._

"_Alright, I'll go" Skipper walked towards the edge of the clearing, "But its your turn next time."_

_Skipper had only been gone two minutes when the three penguins heard a bloodcurdling yell. Immediately, they were on their feet. It took them but a few minutes to follow Skipper's footsteps and the sound of the scream until they reached a second clearing. Skipper lay motionless on the ground, his eyes wide with fear, mumbling seemingly random words._

"Ah 'eemember" Rico glared at Kowalski, "What 'at got to oo 'ith it?"

"Everything Rico," Kowalski replied, "Thats the motive. They say thats why he allegedly got addicted to the lychee nuts." Kowalski put a CD into the drive of his crazy inventions made of parts cannibalized from an old laptop. The device projected a film on to the opposite wall:

"_Manfridi, have you been stealing lychee nuts from the stash?" Rico asked as he came running up to Manfridi's bunk, where the latter penguin was reading a book._

"_No. We both know my maximum is two a day. Has Johnson been taking them?" Manfridi replied putting his book down._

"_No, Johnson's pretty against the whole red lychee nut thing. Do you think Skipper's on to us?"_

"_If he was he'd have confiscated the whole thing." _

The tape ended.

"X got his hands on that tape." Kowalski explained. Private and Rico were still baffled.

"K'walski, I don't really understand what that was about." Private stated.

"Private, those two events have led Mason to believe that Skipper became addicted to red lychee nuts three weeks before the murders. Here this might explain things," Kowalski pressed a button on the screen, a photograph of a handwritten note appeared on the screen, "I don't know exactly what it says, it's a very complex encryption, but it's led Mason to believe that Johnson was blackmailing skipper. They also found entries in the Skipper's log that confirm this:"

_Skipper was in his quarters filling out mission reports when his computer announced, "Caller: Private Johnson requests video conference." Skipper clicked on the answer button. Strange, Johnson was in the base, he could have come to see him in person._

"_Yes?" Skipper answered impatiently. _

"_Sir, I have something... personal, to speak to you about." The younger penguin smiled deviously. This was unusual._

"_Well, soldier, I haven't got all week." Skipper replied cheerfully. _

"_It's concerning your latest habit."_

"_What? Early morning jogs?"_

"_Red lychee nuts." _

"_Are you drunk?"_

"_Skipper, I have proof," Johnson held some red lychee nut shells up to the camera, "They have your fingerprints all over it."_

"_Give me those!" Skipper ordered. _

"_You can have them. I have more where they came from. I wouldn't try to steal them from me. I've sent them to a lawyer at an unspecified location. A certain friend of mine, and we both know it isn't manfridi or Rico, will make a call to this lawyer if I disappear for more than a week, so don't try anything."_

"_What do you want?" Skipper asked warily. Johnson had his full attention and he knew it. The files skipper had previously been reading dropped to the floor._

"_Skipper's log: Johnson's requests have been getting worse and worse. Now he wants unofficial control of the team. I can't take it anymore. I have to kill him and his accomplice. I can't simply drop them off in the middle of nowhere, Johnson's too good. He'd just find his way back, and I can't seem to get anything on him. I could try a memory eraser or scrambler drug, but that's too risky. I have no choice but to find them and kill them."_

"_Skipper's log: It's been two days. I just can't do it. Yesterday Johnson told me to tender my resignation and give him command. I have no choice. My stomach may be too weak to take out one of my own, but it wouldn't be under the influence of an overdose of red lychee nuts..."_

"So Mason thinks Skipper killed everyone?" Private asked.

"Nope, they know Rico did." Kowalski replied. Rico and Private thought for a few seconds.

"oo no' makin' a' sense." Rico added. Kowalski shook his head, obviously frustrated.

"Let me start from the beginning. Skipper sees something in that forest that causes him to be unable to speak for a month. Got it? Good. Mason theories that because Skipper was extremely disturbed by the event he became addicted to red lychee nuts, which he stole from Rico and Manfridi's stash. Johnson discovered this and began to blackmail him. Skipper decided to kill Johnson and his unknown partner to keep them quiet. Johnson's specialized knowledge prevented him from disposing of him any other way. Skipper didn't have the nerve so purposely overdosed on red lychee nuts. They found traces of red lychee nut in his blood so we know that he did overdose at some point.

"That's not true! It can't be true!" Private shouted.

"Calm down, Private. I'm not making the accusations, X is. Now, can I continue...?"

**CO means commanding officer ***

**Sorry, I didn't have much time for a spell check, so my spelling and grammar is terrible. I'll come back and update the chapter with better spelling and grammar (probably tomorrow)**


	8. Unintended Consequences

_Skipper walked purposefully through the silent base, a crazed grin on his face. If you looked closely, you'd realize his eyes had a slight red glow to them. He reached the now empty mess hall. He stood in the shadows cast by the door frame and watched the two penguins standing at one of the tables. One was Manfridi and the other as Rico. Manfridi was holding a small box and dividing the red lychee nut's between each other. Skipper looked at the kitchen, visible through a gap in the wall through which food was served. He could see a pile of unwashed dishes, balanced precariously on top of each other in the kitchen sink. Perfect. Skipper raised his flipper, which contained a small pebble and threw it at the unwashed plates, causing them to crash noisily to the floor._

_"What was that?!" Manfridi turned sharply to face the direction the sound had come from. Skipper ducked back into the shadows. Cautiously, Manfridi and Rico made their way to the kitchen._

_"Do you think Skipper's on to us?" Rico whispered cautiously. The two penguins noticed the smashed plates. They looked around. There was nobody was there, "dishes don't fall by themselves..."_

_"Relax, Rico. Cook always stacks 'em too high," Manfridi grabbed a broom and began to collect the remains of the plates, "Still, we should clean these up just in case anyone asks questions."_

_Skipper had wasted no time once the two penguins had been distracted. He had ran across the mess hall towards the table his teammates had been sitting at. There were two piles of lychee nuts on the table. Rico had the bigger pile, he had taken six, and Manfridi the smaller, as he was only able to handle two. Skipper placed a small bottle and a syringe on the table. The bottle read: "Red Lychee Nut concentrate. Extremely dangerous. Do not consume." Skipper pushed the syringe into the lid, drawing a couple of millimeters. He injected this into the first of Rico's lychees. He repeated the process until he heard the sound of footsteps. Manfridi and Rico had finished faster than expected. Never mind, he had already given Rico enough to feel the permanent effects. All he had to do was wait._

" 'At' no' true!" Rico protested fiercely.

"So what your saying, K'walski, is that Skipper injected concentrated red lychee nut into Rico's lychee nuts so he would go crazy and kill everyone in the base? It doesn't really make sense. Why didn't he just... Do it himself?" Private asked. This was obviously a difficult topic for the boy.

"Fair question. Skipper simply realized that if he did it, there was a chance it could be traced back to him, but if he got Rico to do it, everyone would simply blame Rico and he would be an innocent survivor." Kowalski explained. Private nodded.

"So otherwise, everything went just as Skipper told Rico?"

"Yes, apart from the part where Rico spared him. You see, Skipper did go to the radio room, but that was long after Rico had fled the base."

_"Mission accomplished." Skipper smiled cruelly. This was followed by that crazed laughter, starting at barely a whisper, then rising to a crescendo, and finally turning to a slight chuckle. His eyes seemed to glow even more when he laughed. He kicked the body of a dead officer out of the way, taking delight at the steadily growing pool of blood this revealed. A small object fell out of the soldier's pocket and clattered to the floor. Skipper didn't even notice, and kept walking towards the opposite wall. _

_He was standing center of the room, admiring the gruesome scene when he was suddenly overcome with a agonizing headache. He dropped to the floor writhing in pain. Then, as suddenly and spontaneously as it started, it stopped. The previously tense figure relaxed into unconsciousness._

_Skipper was awake, his eyes still closed. He was lying on some hard surface. There was a coppery taste in his mouth. He seemed to be lying in a puddle of something warm and sticky. He opened his eyes, but things were blurry and out of focus. All he could see was the color red. He stood up, wiping the mystery liquid off his face. His vision was starting to come back into focus._

_"Where am I..." He froze, "Oh tuna..." It didn't take him long to put two and two together. He remembered eating the lychee nuts, but that was the last thing he remembered. It was obvious he had done this. Skipper stumbled backwards until his back was against the wall. He had done this. _

_"No!" He screamed, "No! I couldn't have... I... I..." A nearby monitor flickered to life. _

_"Skipper, Rico what are you...!" Bang._

_"Skipper, Rico what are you...!" Bang._

_"Skipper, Rico what are you...!" Bang. The screen kept replaying that same scene again and again. For a few seconds skipper stared at the grainy footage._

_"Skipper, Rico what are you...!" Bang._

_"Skipper, Rico what are you...!" Bang. Skipper backed away from it, flipper's over his ears._

_"Stop! Stop it! I cant take it!" Skipper screamed. Then he noticed the lifeless body slumped over the keyboard of the computer, holding the play button down. Skipper pushed the late radio operator out of the way. The film stopped, frozen on the image of Captain Tennyson's final scream. Skipper slammed his flipper onto the reader, tears of pain streaming down his face, mingling with the dried blood matted on his feathers. _

_"Computer, delete all security footage."_

_"Flipper print: recognized. Deleting. Deleting. Deleting. All files deleted." The computer replied. Skipper was faced with a empty screen. _

_He had to get out. He had to get out NOW! Skipper ran for the nearest door. It was a vault, blown open by, he guessed, him. He ran inside and did his best to shut the badly damaged gigantic metal door. He backed into the farthest corner as he tried to calm himself. _

_"Okay... Okay... Get a grip Skipper." He slapped himself in the face. Then he looked down. A red liquid began to seep under the door. He couldn't escape it! Skipper charged blindly about the room, looking for something, anything that could possibly end him. How could he live with the memories of what he'd done. Memories... He walked over to a stand holding a single blue test tube containing a light blue liquid. He didn't need to read the label. He knew what it was. He picked it up, and drank._

"So the blue liquid was an experimental memory scrambling drug. That's how X explains why he's so convinced of his story. The scattered memories reformed the way he wanted them to." Kowalski finished. Private thought about this for a few seconds.

"So, how do we know he drank it. If we could prove he hadn't..."

"They found evidence of the drug in the blood test," Kowalski interrupted.

"'ah 'an ee do?" Rico asked. Kowalski began to write on his clipboard.

"Well, the only thing we can do is prove X is lying."

"So you have a plan?" Private asked, a hopeful smile spreading across his face.

"Yes. I'm going to start going over those messages and tapes. See if I can find any faults, any proof they were forged," Kowalski smiled mischievously, "Tomorrow night, we're going to break into the HQ's evidence locker."

"Isn't the HQ the most secure facility in the world, after Hoboken?" Private asked. He didn't like where this was going.

"Yes. Don't worry, one of us has done it before."

**If your wondering why Skipper wasn't afraid of the needle, it wasn't because of the red lychee nuts. All will be revealed in future chapters.**


	9. Guessing Games

"So, which one of us has broken into the New York Penguin HQ, before?" Private asked. Kowalski gave him the 'you honestly haven't guessed look, "I'm sorry K'walski, but you are being rather cryptic."

"Alright, if you want me to tell you the boring way," Kowalski pouted, "Skipper was ordered to break into the New York Penguin Headquarters, also known as NYPHQ, when it was first built to test it's security. He's also the only one to do it successfully." Kowalski replied.

"But K'walski, Skippah's in Hoboken. If we have to break in to Hoboken to ask Skipper how to break in to NYPHQ, can't we just break him out?"

"He has a radio."

"Yes, but it's only one way. He can't hear us."

"Sometimes I just don't understand your sense of humor, Private. Of course we aren't going to break into Hoboken. We wouldn't be able to do that even with Skipper," Private gave him a puzzled look, "You really don't get it, do you? We're going to send him a note telling him when to start telling us everything he knows about the NYPHQ."

"How can we send him a note?"

"We bribe one of the guards."

"Won't they just keep the money and take the note to Mason?"

"That's the point."

* * *

Mason was staring at the opposite wall, lost in thought, or more likely trying to avoid doing the gigantic pile of paperwork he was supposed to be doing, when one of the lab techs ran in. Mason assumed it was important since the young man had forgotten to knock.

"Sir, Hoboken's intercepted a message. Someone bribed a guard to take a slip of paper, coded, to prisoner 0452's cell. Thats..."

"Skipper. I know. What does it say? Who sent it?" Mason leant forward in his chair. This was important.

"We don't know who sent it, sir. Hand delivered to the guard's mailbox. He took the letter to the warden as soon as he got it."

"I figured. What does it say?"

"It was in one of Skipper's old codes, sir." The messenger handed Mason a slip of paper. Mason's brow furrowed.

"Are you sure you deciphered it correctly?"

"Affirmative."

"Alright, who's Doris Carlyle?"

"There are five Doris Carlyles employed by us and three by Blowhole. There are also six Civilians of that name"

"Give me files on all the Doris Carlyles, and inform Hoboken that I will be over to interrogate prisoner 0452 presently."

* * *

"The note read this: _Proceeding with operation test drive . Will be listening to Penguin News at Nine. Researching information for history project . Believe eight o'clock may be able to help. All cadets at Quarrysdale House need help with this since they brake the vase when it fell into the kitchen._

_Love,_

_Doris Carlyle. _

Now what does that have to do with you? Who's Doris Carlyle?!" Mason demanded. He had been asking Skipper almost all afternoon.

"I don't know any Doris Carlyle." Skipper replied. However, the name seemed vaguely familiar. If Mason would stop shouting in his face he might be able to place it.

"Alright, Why what have you got to do with a history project at Quarrysdale House decoding station?"

"I have no idea. I've never even been to Quarrysdale house."

"Sir, the general is here." The guard poked his head around the door. Skipper would have to wait.

"I'll be back." Mason growled as he left the room.

* * *

Skipper was trying to work out what that message meant for for quite some time. He still couldn't place the name Doris Carlyle. If only Kowalski was here. He'd... That was it! That was where he'd heard Doris Carlyle before. Kowalski had gone on and on and on about her ever since he joined the team. She was a dolphin who had broken Kowalski's heart, by running off to the other side in the middle of their relationship.. So now he knew the letter was from Kowalski.

* * *

It didn't take him much longer to solve the clues in the rest of the message.

1)Operation: Test Drive was the name mission in which he was ordered to break in to the NYPHQ.

2) Penguin News at Nine was a code phrase from his last team. If you wanted to tell someone to report, but were afraid the line was compromised, you would tell the person you would be listening to Penguin News, followed by the time you would expect the report.

3) Agent Eight O'Clock was the infamous penguin agent who's crimes necessitated the creation of the penguin evidence locker (long story)

4) Quarrysdale house, QH, HQ backwards.

5) Brake the vase when it fell into the kitchen.

What Kowalski wanted him to do was tell him everything he knew about the NYPHQ so they could break into the evidence locker. Kowalski had purposely allowed Mason to find the message, knowing he would be questioned about it. It was times like this that he was glad he had picked Kowalski as his lieutenant.

* * *

"Guard, what time is it?" Skipper asked, when his dinner was brought in. They didn't dare allow him out of his cell.

"2053. Why?"

"Oh... Nothing. It's just kind of hard to keep track of the time in here." The guard nodded, then left. Seven minutes later, at least what Skipper guessed was seven minutes later, he switched on the bug. He had left it switched off to save power, since he assumed he could be stuck in Hoboken for months.

"Alright, the first thing you need to know is..." He started. It felt weird talking to himself. He just hoped Kowalski was listening, and not the guard.

**I know the penguins can't read or write, but I couldn't think of another way to send the message. I know you were all hoping they would break into the evidence locker this chapter, but don't worry thats defiantly in the next.**


	10. Breaking in

Kowalski watched as the metal doors closed, noisily, behind him just as the similar doors in front of them opened. It had taken the team over half an hour, but they had finally passed the security tests. "You have the QHC-1?" Mason asked as the penguins followed him through the door and out into a corridor.

"As you requested, sir." Kowalski replied formally, pushing Private to the front of the group. The younger boy shrunk back, terrified.

"Unrestrained?" Mason raised an eyebrow.

"He won't even blink without permission, sir."

"Good." Mason led the way out of the building, through different door. The guards stood aside as the senior officer passed. Mason motioned for one of the guards to escort them to the QHC Research Building.

Kowalski entered the seemingly small building. He had never actually been here before, but Skipper had described it to him. He'd asked Private first, but he refused to talk about the place. Once again, Kowalski heard heavy metal doors closing behind them. There was no going back. The door to Private's cell opened, and Kowalski motioned for the younger penguin to enter.

"Where's the guy with the Mohawk?" The guard asked, noticing Rico's absence.

"Oh, y'know…" Kowalski whirled around, knocking the guard out with a single punch.

"Now, Rico!" Private shouted.

_"Firstly, we need an excuse to get into the base. That, I've already taken care of," Kowalski pointed at a map of the base, drawn from Skipper's description, "Yesterday Mason called, demanding that we return Private to the base," Kowalski pointed at a map of the base, drawn from Skipper's description, "The base and the QHC research centre are linked by a network of underground tunnel, through which, is the only way to access the evidence locker. If we get into the QHC Research centre, we can then enter the tunnels from there." _

_"Guards?" Rico grunted._

_"That would be your job," Kowalski replied, "If you set up your explosives right, you can probably seal the door and catch most of the guards in the explosion…"_

_"It won't kill them?" Private asked._

_"Certainly not," Kowalski lied, "Anyway, we'll keep the guards inside distracted while you do that. Noise isn't a problem. According to Skipper, the building's soundproofed._

* * *

"Done?" Kowalski asked. Rico nodded, before regurgitating a latex mask, a lab coat, and a pair of comically gigantic glasses. Kowalski picked them up off the floor and put them on. When he turned around, he looked an entirely different person. Kowalski checked his right pocket. Inside was a small plastic card. Kowalski waved it in front of a reader and the door, leading to the tunnel network opened. Kowalski stepped out into the hallway. When he gave the all clear, Private and Rico followed. This was the same for every corridor, until they reached the entrance to the evidence locker. There were two guards posted outside the door.

"What's the time?" Kowalski asked. Rico regurgitated a watch, "Good." Kowalski walked around the corner and towards the door. Kowalski handed the first guard the badge for verification. He then received a flipper print scan, followed by a retinal scan. He cleared both. The door opened and he walked onto yet another room, where he went through a metal detector. Instantly, Rico and Private knocked out the two guards and slipped into the second room, just before the doors closed.

"Hey! Who are…?" The man behind the metal detector shouted, but was out before he was able to raise the alarm.

_"There are three guards in charge of security at the entrance to every classified room," the recording of Skipper informed, "They report every fifteen minutes. If they are more than two minutes late, ten guards are sent to check on the room. They have a one minute response time. If you try to make the call yourself, it won't work. They use voice recognition software. Both doors are solid steel and would take you thirty minutes to cut through by which time the inner guard would have reported the disturbance. If you manage to get passed the outer guards, the flipper scanner and the retinal scanner, the inner guard must activate the metal detector and clear you, both activated by voice recognition, within two minutes of the first door opening or an alarm sounds." Kowalski paused the tape, and then tossed a plastic badge across the table towards the other two penguins. Rico picked it up._

_"G'forg'ry." He complemented, examining the badge._

_"It's not a forgery. Mackerel, I wouldn't even try forging one of those. No, a Robert Smith, in ballistics, received an all-expenses paid holiday to Denmark, and happened to misplace his badge." Kowalski replied._

_"Is that misplaced with air quotes or without?" Private asked._

_"Without. I stole it. The holiday was only there to make sure he didn't turn up at the office at the same time as me." Private nodded. That would be hard to explain._

_"What about the guards, the flipper print scanner and the retinal scanner?"_

_"Simple," Kowalski held up two tiny black boxes, and motioned towards a flipper print reader lying on the table, "this is the same type they use at the base. It has been programed to only accept Rico's flipper. Now, observe." Kowalski held one of the small boxes in his flipper as he placed it on the scanner. Rico waited for the inevitable, "Access: denied."_

_"Access: granted. Hello, Rico." The device replied._

* * *

The team entered the evidence locker.

Kowalski removed his disguise. It was useless now. Since Robert Smith was the last person to enter, the guards would be looking for him too. "Right, take anything that could possibly have anything to do with Skipper. I'll see what I can get out of the computer. Remember, we now have thirteen minutes before we the guards are due to report."


	11. Breaking Out

12 Minutes Later

"Hey, Johnny, you in there?" An unknown voice asked. Kowalski could hear footsteps coming down the hall. He had left the doors open. He looked at the computer hesitantly.

_"Make sure you keep the doors open, because as soon as they shut the in-room safety protocols are activated. By that I mean, 243 motion sensors covering the whole room except the computer banks. They're all controlled by the main security station, so you can't hack them from the tunnels."_

Kowalski had no choice. He typed in the command. Immediately, the steel doors ground shut and the lights switched off. Fortunately, every member of the team was standing in a motion sensor free area. The bad news was that they would have to pass through motion sensor infested territory to reach the air vents, which were now the only way out.

"K'walski?" Private whispered. Rico regurgitated a torch and switched it on. Now they could see that Kowalski was on the other side of one of the large concrete shelves.

"Right, here's the plan: according to Skipper, the motion sensors won't pick us up if we move at slower than three inches per second." Kowalski began to slowly shuffle forward.

"But, K'walski, It's going to take us several minutes to get across the room. Won't the guards be there by then?" Private inquired.

"I know, Private. It's going to be close…" Rico rolled his eyes.

"Oh, Wha' a 'ell," Rico grunted, before regurgitation a stick of dynamite and simply blasting his way through the shelves and across the room.

"Intruder in the evidence locker, I repeat intruder in the evidence locker. Unit five, respond to disturbance!" A voice shouted over the loud speaker. Kowalski and Private followed Rico towards the air ducts. Their only priority now, was speed.

"Alright Rico, deploy the decoys." Kowalski ordered. Now that he thought about it, Rico's plan was the better option, not that he would admit it. Rico regurgitated three penguin shaped wind-up toys, and set them off in the opposite direction to the direction they were going. That would, hopefully buy them some time.

* * *

_"There are only three exits from the tunnels. The first is the QHC Research Centre, the second is the main base and the third is a maintenance shaft, still controlled by the old security system. This security system is based in the tunnels and has been walled up. It hasn't been used for decades. However, it still works and is accessible through the air ducts. It's also important to note that the old security system is able to patch through to the controls to the doors to the main base." Kowalski paused the tape._

_"That's our exit."_

_"But, attempting to go straight through the main passage and into the main base would be suicide." Private protested._

_"I meant the old maintenance hatch. Let me put it this way. If we follow the current plan, we've blasted the QHC exit, so our only other options are the maintenance shaft exit or the main base exit. We're going for the maintenance shaft, which we need to unlock from the old security centre." Kowalski drew a line indicating their route on the map._

_"wai' if ee go tha' way...?" Rico questioned._

_"Good question, Rico. To get from the air vent we'd be in, to the one that links to the control centre, we would need to walk directly in front of the guards in the main passage. Don't worry, I have that covered."_

"Why are we stopping?" Private asked. Kowalski ignored the question, instead looking down through the grate at the single guard, seated at a computer bank.

"On three, Rico." Kowalski whispered. Rico nodded, regurgitating a screw driver and a length of rope. Carefully, Kowalski removed the screws holding the grate in place, then removed the grate itself. He tied the length of rope around his waist, then squeezed himself through the open hole. Rico had already taken the other end of the rope, and was slowly lowering Kowalski down. Before long, he was hanging just behind the guard's head. Kowalski karate chopped him on the back of the neck. Rico lowered him the rest of the way down as the guard slumped to the floor. Kowalski pushed the unconscious body aside and opened the controls for the tunnels' electricity.

"Alright, Rico. I'm about to cut the power. We have three minutes to get past the guards before the emergency generators kick in and the lights switch back on. Ready?" Rico nodded, "Pull me up."

* * *

"Hey, what happened to the lights?" One of the soldiers asked.

"I don't know… Ow! Who was that?" The second exclaimed as he collided with the first.

"Sorry that was me."

"You'd better be sorry…" The second growled. Kowalski smiled. They'd all be so busy trying to work out who's who to notice the three of them crossing the hallway to the other air duct. Silently, and with only ten seconds to spare, the three penguins dropped from their hiding place, then darted across the hall and into the air duct on the other side.

* * *

It hadn't taken Kowalski long to route the controls to the doors controlled by the old system through his smart phone. This would allow him to lock and unlock the doors wirelessly. The team climbed out of the air shaft and dropped down into an empty corridor. They continued down this, until they came to a cross roads. One way led to the security garrison in the centre of the base and the other to the older part of the tunnel system. This was obvious as the material the walls were made with changed from solid concrete to timber beams holding back crumbling cement. They continued to run down this older passage, and turned right. The team froze. This was bad.

* * *

"Security Garrison motion sensor activated in sector Charlie 7. Intruders are armed and extremely dangerous, over." Captain Wilson, the penguin in charge of the security garrison stationed in the centre of the underground base picked up his radio.

"Responding with all troops, over and out." Wilson put down the radio.

* * *

"What was that?!" Private Anderson, noticed a blur of black and white out of the corner of his eye.

"What was what?" his commanding officer asked.

"Sir, I think someone just dived into that air duct. Permission to investigate?"

"I think that was your imagination…" The senior officer's radio crackled to life.

"Intruders spotted in Beta 3 sector discovered to be decoys. All units be on alert for any suspicious activity." Private Anderson did his best to hold back a smirk.

"With all due respect, sir, I believe we should investigate."

* * *

Kowalski stared at what was supposed to be the maintenance shaft, now reduced to a pile of rubble. He and the team were standing in a corridor that ran across the entrance to the maintenance shaft, in what would, on a map, look like the letter T.

_"Be careful in the older tunnels. They used to belong to an older base, that was demolished years ago to make way for the current one. Any kind of gunshot, explosion will cause a collapse. There's a reason they don't use those anymore…"_

It was obvious that the explosions in the QHC Research Centre had caused this structurally unstable section of tunnel to collapse.

"Intruders! Put your hands in the air." Someone shouted from around the corner.

"Oh come on!" Kowalski shouted as he ran away from the sound of the approaching soldiers to the opposite side of the corridor. Just as they were about to round the corridor, Private, who was in the lead, skidded to a halt.

"Kowalski, we're surrounded!" Private shouted. Sure enough, another group of guards was advancing towards the trapped penguins from the opposite side.

"Oh… Mackerel." Kowalski searched the corridor, desperately. Finally he spotted another air vent. Without checking the map to see where it went, the team dived inside, closing the grate behind them.

* * *

Once the team was sure they hadn't been followed, Kowalski stopped, bringing up the map on his electronic device. He then motioned to Rico for his clip board, which he began to write franticly on. Finally, stopped.

"I've come up with some options…"

* * *

"Headquarters, the intruders are… *kaboom* *gunfire* Send help… *crash*" the penguin in the main base's control room heard shouted over the radio, intermitted interrupted with gunfire.

"State your name and rank, over." The listener shouted back.

"Does that really matter?! Get them over here now! I'm not sure how much longer we can…*static*" It took a few seconds for the penguin on the other end of the line to process this. Finally he picked up the radio.

"All units, return to main garrison. I repeat, return to main garrison."

"Do you think it worked?" Private asked tentatively as Kowalski dropped the radio and crawled into an air vent on the opposite side of the room. Rico had enjoyed doing the sound effects.

"I don't know. Come on, they'll be here soon."

* * *

True to the plan, when they arrived at the elevators that led out of the base, it was guarded by only one penguin. The others had gone to answer the 'distress call'. It didn't take long to knock him out. Kowalski pulled out his smart phone and unlocked the doors to the elevators. All they had to do from this point on was look confident and hope nobody bothered to ask why Private hadn't been dropped off at the QHC Research Centre. At least, that was the plan… for now.

**I've used Kowalski's smart phone from the episode Thumb Drive.**


	12. At Last, The Truth

**I know I've done way too many court room drama endings, but it seemed to be the easiest way of getting all the facts together. Believe me, I tried about six other ways and they were incredibly confusing (even to me). **

"The prosecution aims to prove that the defendant, Skipper, real name classified, did wilfully murder the inhabitants of Temporary Evacuation Base Y…" Barry Smart, the prosecutor, announced before continuing on by telling the same version of the events Kowalski had told the team.

* * *

"…there were traces of red lychee nuts and a memory eraser drug in the defendants blood." The witness, a Dr Hamilton, answered.

"Thank you, doctor, no further questions. Cross examine." Mr Smart concluded. Kowalski stood up and walked over to the stand.

"So, Dr Hamilton, you stated that you found evidence of red lychee nut in the defendant's blood. However, there was no evidence of the cell damage that comes with regular doses. Does that mean, that the defendant may have had only one dose?" The analyst, turned lawyer, asked.

"Yes, that or he had only been taking them for a limited amount of time, or in doses small enough that he would feel no effects."

"Would you be prepared to testify that the defendant had not been taking the lychees for long or had been taking them in small enough doses that he could not have been the addict the prosecution has described?"

"Y…" The doctor looked past Kowalski, at one of the men in the gallery, "I… I… I mean… no."

Kowalski looked behind them to where the doctor had been looking. He was obviously being influenced in some way, either by bribe or blackmail. Kowalski sighed. There was nothing he could do about it now.

"Doctor, do lychee nuts have any dulling impacts of phobias? Shall we say, to the point at which a person terrified of water would be able to swim without any fear whatsoever?"

"No. They have absolutely no effect on phobias."

"So how could Skipper have used a hypodermic needle to inject a lychee nut concentrate into Rico's red lychee nuts?" Once again the doctor looked past Kowalski at the penguin at the back of the room. Kowalski held up a shiny metal fountain pen he had been carrying as if he was about to write something on his clipboard. In the reflection if the nib he could see that the penguin in the back row was holding up a piñata. Bribery.

"It is possible that… um… he… um… applied it topically. I only assumed that he had used a needle, that seems like the most practical way of doing… what the defendant did." Kowalski put the clipboard down. He had hoped to establish a reasonable doubt, using that, but that doctor just had to have an excuse for everything.

"Now, would you say Skipper's symptoms after the accident are similar to the aftereffects of an earlier version of the memory scrambling drug that would look the same as the current one in a blood test."

"Yes…" Replied the confused doctor.

"No further questions."

* * *

"I would like to call Major X to the stand." X stood up and walked towards the witness stand.

"Raise your right hand. Do you swear that the testimony you are about to give the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth? State your name."

"X."

"Be seated."

"Major X, where you were on Friday, 17 April last year, or to put it another way, where were you at the time of the incident in the forest?" Kowalski asked.

"New York."

"Can anyone prove you were there? Did anyone see you?"

"Do I have an alibi? Yes, I met up with some friends of mine." X lied. Kowalski smiled. He had him trapped.

"I would like to enter this airline ticket into evidence." Kowalski passed the panel of officers the ticket, "According to this airline ticket, verified by persons at the airport who are prepared to testify as to its authenticity, you were staying in a town only 54 miles from the base…"

"I object! Council is going on a fishing expedition! Major X's location at that time is incompetent irrelevant and immaterial." Smart protested.

"It's about to become pretty relevant so cut the red tape and listen!" Kowalski shouted at the prosecutor before turning back to Major X, and continuing in a more civil tone, "Now, Major X, this is what I think you were doing on Friday, April 17…"

_"Alright, I'll go, but next time it's your turn." Skipper walked away from the clearing and into the forest. He had been walking only a few minutes when he realised he was being followed. He turned around, to see Major X!? Suddenly he found himself thrown to the ground by two other men. X removed something from his pocket._

_"NEEDLES!" Skipper screamed, but a wing was clamped over his mouth, muffling the sound. _

_"Skipper? Are you alright?" a voice called. X realised he was going to have to work fast. He pulled out a gigantic needle and injected a small capsule into his wing, "Won't… 'et away with… this." Skipper spat._

_"Oh, but I will," X pulled out another needle, smaller this time, "You won't remember anything…"_

"That's not true! I didn't have access to the classified memory eraser drugs. Alright, so I might have been in the area, but I didn't…" X protested.

"But you did have access to an earlier version, for example the one I was questioning the doctor about earlier. The one whose side effects match Skipper's symptoms."

"Why would I want to erase Skipper's memory?" X asked innocently.

"Because you didn't want him to remember that you had injected him with a radio controlled nano capsule containing red lychee nut concentrate, which you could activate wirelessly, causing Skipper to go insane with the simple push of a button."

"You can't prove it!"

"Yes I can," Kowalski pulled out a small plastic bag containing an almost too small to see capsule, "Your honour, I would like to enter into evidence this time release capsule, removed from the defendant's arm before he was placed in the custody of Special Agent Mason, and somehow 'lost'." The officers examined the almost microscopic object.

"I admit that I have access to those, but you can't prove it's mine." X shouted back.

"Actually, I can…" Kowalski held up a small cell phone, "With the court's permission, I would like to play some recovered video footage found on this cell phone, which was recovered from the base by the forensic teams, which was then wiped and somehow found its way into the garbage disposal. I happen to know that this belonged to a Lieutenant Andrews, who had been filming the murder until he was killed himself. When the phone hit the floor it continued to film the room untill it ran out of batterys" Kowalski connected the device to a projector, so the court could see.

_The tape showed the radio room, just after the murders. _

_"Do we kill him? Cause, you said you expected Rico to, but he…" A voice off screen asked._

_"No, I think it was actually a good thing Rico didn't kill him. Now that Skipper's the only survivor, there will naturally be a lot of suspicion." X replied._

_"I don't get it?" the first speaker asked, mystified._

_"We can frame him. Now, erase the security footage." Skipper's unconscious form was dragged across the screen. The penguin, previously off screen, grabbed Skipper's wing and pressed it against the wing print reader._

_"Wing print: recognised." The computer replied._

_"Wipe all footage."_

X smiled crazily. "You have it all wrong *insane laughter* You think you're so smart, don't you. You think you worked it all out, but you didn't! You see, you were right about what happened in the forest, but you were wrong about the rest. We had intended to have Skipper destroy the base, well I was only interested in destroying him and his team. We planned to have him destroy the base, then we would kill him."

"Genius," Kowalski replied sarcastically, "and I suppose revenge was your motive."

"Yes, revenge was my motive. Skipper and his team were up to something all along. I tried to prove it, but nobody listened. They all said I was crazy! I'm not crazy!"

"Of course not. What else did I get wrong?" X had fallen right into Kowalski's trap. By proving he was guilty, but getting most of the facts wrong, X's ego would force him to confess.

"No, I activated the transmitter, but it didn't work. I decided to take a risk and actually enter the base put it into his food, but I came across Rico first. He and Manfridi were actually in the mess hall, eating red lychee nuts. Now that was an opportunity I couldn't turn down."

"After that, everything went just like Skipper told Rico?" Kowalski asked.

"Yes. Yes it did. It all went perfectly, except for the fact Rico hadn't killed Skipper, for some reason I still don't know. That was when it came to me. Why should I kill him myself and risk leaving some clue behind, when I can frame him for mass murder.

"What about the two missing months?"

"Oh that. I needed time to create the necessary forgeries and make 'friends' in the forensics department. If I simply let Skipper go, he would report what happened the base would be swarming with investigators within hours. So I tipped off Savio on his location. I paid him to keep Skipper alive for two months. Of course, after that, I wiped his memory again and sent him on his way."

"Then why were traces of red lychee nuts found in the defendant's blood?" Smart asked.

"I think I can answer that," Kowalski replied, "For those of you who don't know, nano capsules start to deteriorate if they aren't activated within a limited amount of time. That meant that as the capsule deteriorated, the red lychee nut was being slowly leaked, in harmlessly small amounts, into Skipper's blood. According to Dr Hamilton's testimony, before he was cut off by a certain officer holding a piñata, that would cause the results he found in the blood test." The officers on the panel thought about this for a few seconds, "Well, looking at the evidence, it seems we have no choice but to give the verdict of…" X stood up from the stand, whipping a pistol from his belt and pointing it at Skipper.

"If I go down, you're coming with me!" X snarled, "All those years, I knew you and your team were up to something, but nobody would believe it. It cost me a lot trying to prove you were up to something, my goatee, my honour and nearly my rank."

"Add sanity to the list" Skipper replied sarcastically.

"na' good idea…" Rico replied nervously. He didn't want to make a move, in case X took that as a threat and shot Skipper first.

"You just keep claiming you're innocent, smiling and waving, smiling and waving. Not today. You're going to face justice!"

* * *

Private looked on in horror at the scene unfolding before him. He had entered the courtroom, in disguise. If mason recognised him he'd be recaptured. Private looked from X to Skipper. This wasn't like the last time Skipper's life had been threatened. This wasn't just a trick to get him to use the hypercute. X's finger was on the trigger… "I swore I would never use this again…" Private stood up, removed the large hat covering his face and…

* * *

X collapsed into his chair, overwhelmed by the sheer cuteness. Smoke rose from his clothing and there was morbid smell of charred flesh.

"Bravo, bravo!" Mason applauded, "The weapon managed to channel his 139% cuteness at one single enemy! This is an absolute breakthrough in…" Private didn't hear the rest. The world seemed to blur into black and white.

"I didn't mean to… I was just so… angry." Private stumbled backwards into the penguin behind him.

"Are you okay?" The penguin caught him, then nearly dropped him again when he saw his face, "…Mr Tux?"

**Who was the penguin who recognised Private? I'll give you a clue, Its not penguin version armadillo kid.**


	13. Motive

"Uncle Nigel…?" Private stuttered. Uncle Nigel was the only one he never minded calling him Mr Tux. It had originally been his nick name, but some kid at school, all he could remember about him was that he came from Amarillo and was an armadillo, had started to use it to tease him. After that he refused to answer to anyone who called him that except Uncle Nigel.

"Detain the weapon!" Mason shouted. Suddenly, three soldiers appeared out of nowhere. Private was snatched from Uncle Nigel's flippers and dragged towards the door. Mason ran over to Nigel, "Don't worry sir, the threat is neutralised. Rest assured that it won't escape again."

"It? He's my nephew!" Nigel exclaimed, furious, "I spent every waking moment of my life since he disappeared searching for him." Mason stumbled backwards in surprise. The rest of the team was pretty surprised too. Private was the nephew of arguably the best spy alive?

"But sir, it was for national security… The QHC-1 were to fall into the hands of the enemy…"

"You took my nephew, and turned him into a weapon?!" Nigel turned to the penguins holding Private, "Release him immediately." The three guards turned to Mason, who nodded grudgingly.

"Sir, yes, sir." They replied in unison, releasing private, who ran over to his uncle.

"Sir, I must insist that the QHC-1 is absolutely vital to…"

"You kidnapped, an from what I've heard in this court room, you then handed him over to an agent suspected of mass murder, who already had a reputation as one of the most successful and brutal leaders in the penguin force, with orders to torture him until he stopped questioning the morality of what you were forcing him to do."

"Sir, perhaps we should talk about this in my office…"

"I'm not leaving my nephew alone with you in control of this facility," Uncle Nigel stood up, "Come on, Tux."

"But…"

"We're leaving, now."

"Well, Skipper, now that X has confessed I think we can get going too." Skipper began to walk towards the door. Mason barred the way.

"Not so fast. We still have some questions for you. You and Rico," he pointed at Kowalski, "escort yourselves out of this building or these gentlemen will."

* * *

Nigel started towards the car park, Private doing his best to keep up.

"Come on, Percival." He called behind him when Private had fallen behind.

"Who's Percival, Uncle Nigel?" Private asked. Nigel froze in his tracks.

"Flying flounder…" Nigel stared at Private. He didn't even know his own name, thanks to Mason. He'd probably use the excuse that it was for security, to make sure Tux couldn't give away his family's identities, but Nigel knew better. Mason had done it simply because he could.

"That's your name."

"Percival…" Private mused, "Skippah always called me Private." Nigel wrapped a wing around the younger penguin.

"Tux… I can't believe what they made you go through."

"Skippah's not such a bad person once you get to know him…"

"But, the files said you'd been tortured. Mason said in his report that his lieutenant had told him…" Private smiled.

"K'walski was lying about that. He just had to convince Mason that I didn't need more than one guard. The worst Skippah ever did was give me extra training."

"Extra training?"

"Yes, he was in a bit bad mood after Experimental Station D was, well… He made me do extra training all night, for the next two days. I can understand why he thought I needed some discipline…"

"Extra training?! Private, what Skipper was doing, depriving you of sleep, was well known form of torture. What he was intending to do, was keep you awake, until you broke."

"I don't believe Skippah would ever meant to do that. He apologised afterwards!"

"Private, that was part of it. Have you ever heard of Stockholm syndrome? I won't go into detail, but by showing you what was supposedly an act of kindness, he was insuring your loyalty. Essentially, he didn't need to break you to obtain his objective. Whatever loyalty you feel towards him, it isn't real. He planned it all from the start. Don't you understand? You don't become someone like Skipper unless… unless you're willing to do the unthinkable."

"I don't believe you! It can't be true!"

"Listen to me, Tux. It is true. Look at Kowalski, Skipper recruited him directly after his home and friends were destroyed. He knew that under that much stress, Kowalski wouldn't have time to think over what he was doing and would simply follow blindly. The effect would last even after the danger was over," Percival still wasn't convinced, "Rico, had no contact with any penguin for several months, after being branded a mass murderer. He would join anyone who was willing to accept him."

"I…"

"I'm sorry, Percival. I wish it wasn't true…"

"Excuse me sir, but the QHC will have to come with us." Nigel found his path blocked by two men in dark suits and sunglasses, guns trained on the younger penguin. Tuna! Mason couldn't take Tux in front of all those people, but as soon as he was outside the building… Nigel looked at the two men warily. Alone, he's probably be able to get away, but with Tux…

"Do as they say, Tux." Nigel turned to his nephew, "I…"

* * *

"So they took Private too."

"Who are…" Nigel turned around.

"Kowalski, sir. I arranged the meeting." The penguin introduced himself. A few days ago Nigel had received a letter, hand delivered, untraceable. The letter told him that the sender might be able to help get Percival back, and to wait at the snow cone cart closest to the central park zoo.

"So, you're Kowalski. What do you know about my nephew?"

"No more than you, sir. But I want to get private back just as much as you, if there's any way me and Rico can help..."

"What makes you think I need your help?"

"Well, I assumed you'd get him out with your friends in high places, but I'm guessing Mason had friends in higher ones."

"If you're going to try and break him out, they're holding him in Hoboken…"

"Oh proton…" Kowalski gasped. Private wouldn't last ten seconds in Hoboken. Nigel scrutinised him for a few seconds.

"You really do care, don't you?" Nigel asked sceptically.

"He was like a little brother to me," Kowalski picked up his clipboard, "Options, Kowalski. Think of some options…"

"You said they'd taken Private too. Who else is Mason holding?" Nigel interrupted. Kowalski looked up from his clipboard.

"Skipper."

* * *

"You said you only wanted to ask a few questions." Skipper stated, "I haven't heard any questions yet, and my hands are getting sore." Skipper looked at his hands, which were bound to the chair.

"Then, it's safe to say, I lied to you." Mason replied.

"In case you fell asleep during the trial, I'm innocent."

"Your lieutenant's performance inspired me, Skipper. Yes you may not have actually destroyed the Temporary Evacuation centre, but you certainly have the potential to do that, and much more, under the influence of the right..."

"You aren't seriously…"

"You will join your little Private in the QHC research centre. The scientists there will prepare you for your first test. Yes, RLEA-2 Prototype, you have great potential."

"Is it something in the water, because all the high ranking officers here seem to be going power mad. And by the way, I already have a code name. I don't need some fancy acronym."

"Despite what you might think, your 'witty repartee' is not amusing."

"Yeah, that was pretty bad," Skipper smiled, "But it makes a decent distraction."


	14. Brute Force and Negotiation

"I can't help feeling sorry for you and your misguided loyalty," Nigel shook his head, "I have to keep reminding myself that your actions were not your own."

"You seem pretty determined to demonize him, don't you?" Kowalski replied.

"I I'm not going to hide the truth."

"Let me put it this way. If Skipper was as bad as you say he is, they wouldn't need the red lychee nuts to turn him into a weapon of mass destruction."

"It does increase strength and intelligence…"

"He tried to help private as much as he could every step of the way. Did you ever wonder why Private had to be recaptured? Skipper didn't intend to give him back. He had already arranged with a friend to allow him to disappear. If Skipper had been following orders Mason would have had him back the moment we returned. You can dispute the reasons for my loyalty, and you could be right, but you can't dispute facts. Now do you believe me?" Nigel nodded.

"Alright, how do we get them out?"

"Well, while we were talking, I came up with some options…"

* * *

Skipper stood up from the chair. While he had kept Mason talking, he had cut the ropes with small piece of glass he had found on the floor of the courtroom. Mason stood up, reaching for the drawer where he kept his gun. It wasn't there.

"Looking for this?" Skipper's hand held Mason's missing gun.

"How…"

"Remember when I first walked in? I tripped. I grabbed on to the desk for support. Had you been any kind of agent you would have noticed that I removed the gun from your drawer."

"What do you want?" Mason asked.

"To talk."

* * *

"Mr…"

"Please call me Joey, sir," The kangaroo replied excitedly, " It's such an honour to meet you sir."

"You've been warden here for… seven years?"

"Yes, sir."

"How do you feel about one of the… prisoners. A young boy? They call him QHC-1."

"Poor kid. Hoboken's no place for a boy." The kangaroo shook his head sadly, "If you're trying to see him, I've got no control over him. They don't even use my guards. That Mason fellow just wanted to use the cell." Kowalski nodded. He'd already known this. Mason didn't trust anyone but his own men to have anything to do with Private.

"What about a penguin called Skipper?"

"He's not here anymore. He was released yesterday. I have to say, I'm glad. He was having a pretty nasty effect on some of the prisoners. Y'see, he put them all there, and they all wanted revenge."

"Would you do me a favour?" Nigel asked cautiously.

"Depends on the favour."

"I would like you to send it down the grapevine, that Skipper is being transferred back today."

"But that will cause a riot! It's already hard enough to keep them in as it is. I have a record of no escapes. I don't want to break it."

"Really, Joey…"

"That's okay, if you don't feel comfortable with that," Kowalski interrupted. Rico regurgitated some papers, "These give us clearance to visit prisoners 0934, 7263, 2245, 3446,0236, and 2008." Joey looked at the forms.

"But those are the most dangerous… Well, can't argue with a court order."

* * *

"What do you want?" Blowhole demanded.

"We want to help you." Nigel replied. He was standing outside blowhole's cell. Kowalski had gone off to talk to Hans and Blowhole would recognise Rico.

"Help me?"

"I want Skipper dead, just like you."

"Well, pen-gu-in, there isn't exactly much I can do from here. If your suggesting that I should escape…"

"You've tried by yourself, and failed. Several times. I suggest you team up with someone. Hans maybe?"

"Certainly not. I will not allow my genius to be hampered by that… that WIFI thief!"

"I was suggesting that you use him. Kill him once he's done his job. Hans is willing to work with you. In fact, it would seem the rest of Hoboken's maximum security inmates are willing to work together. I can tell you exactly were Skipper is and give you certain information that would helpful to your escape plan."

"I'm interested…"

* * *

"So, you are saying, that none of us have ever managed to escape from Hoboken, because we all refused to work together?" Hans asked suspiciously.

"Exactly, sort of like a divide and conquer technique." Kowalski replied.

"Well, as much as I despise that one eyed dolphin, I am willing to put up with him if it means getting to Skippar."

"That's good to hear."

* * *

"You want to talk? I was under the impression that was exactly what you were doing."

"I felt this would make you listen." Skipper replied.

"You won't get away with this. If you fire a shot…"

"I know, alarms will sound and I'll be booked with murder, again. Well, I haven't got much left to lose."

"You have your life."

"Not anymore. If you have your way, I won't even be in control of my own mind."

"So what do you want to talk about?"

"Statistics, as Kowalski would probably tell you."

* * *

It had all worked just as Kowalski had planned. He'd remembered what he had heard Skipper say over the radio, that they could only keep the prisoners in because they were too busy fighting each other to plan an escape. What Kowalski had done was united them on a common goal. Now that they were working together, they were able to escape, in other words, taking down all the defences so they could just walk strait through. Which is exactly what they did.

* * *

They opened the door to Private's cell.

"Private?" Kowalski looked around the room. Private was gone. Kowalski pulled out his clipboard, "General Relativity! I forgot to consider…" Rico regurgitated private's lunicorn.

"'rivate? 'ee rescue oo." He called softly. A small shivering figure poked his head up from behind the bed where he'd been hiding. As soon as he saw who it was he jumped up and came charging towards them. Never before had he been so happy to see his fellow teammates, and of course, Uncle Nigel.

* * *

"So that was your plan, keep me distracted while your team steals the weapon." Mason growled. He had just heard the alert over the intercom.

"Obviously." Skipper replied smugly. This hadn't actually been his plan, but why waste a good opportunity to brag to Mason?

"So your team is now out in the open and all ready to hunt down. You have accomplished nothing."

"That's why I wanted to talk to you. Tell me, what have my team managed to accomplish? Name one other team or agent, excluding Buck Rockgut, who has ever done that."

"I…"

"What are me and Private able to do alone? I can destroy one minimum security temporary base, and Private can knock people out. That's nothing compared to what we did as a team."

"So your point is?"

"Let us operate as a team."

"That's far too dangerous, what if Blowhole got hold of you or the weapon? The situation would be…"

"Mason, you couldn't hold the two of us for more than a week. What chance does Blowhole have? I'll put it this way, do you want us as an enemy or as an ally?"

"I still have the QHC-1. I'll order it's destruction if you don't release me."

"You don't have Private, remember. I do. Now, do you want to make a deal?"

"Fine.

* * *

"No, I won't allow it!" Nigel protested. Skipper had just explained the terms of the proposal, "I certainly won't leave him to you and your psychotic team. He was better off in Hoboken."

"We both know that's not true." Skipper replied.

"We both know it is. We've just released fifteen of the most dangerous people in history, all of which have a vendetta against you and your team."

"Nigel, you can either give him to me, give him to Mason, or have him hunted for the rest of his life."

"I'm not leaving him with you!"

"I don't understand what you have against…" Skipper paused. Now that he thought about it, Nigel was right. He wasn't exactly the kind of person you would want to leave your niece with, "Sir, None of us wanted to bring a kid into this insane ,twisted world, but the point is: he's here, regardless of anything I say or do!"

"You can't possibly understand what that boy went through."

"You're right. I can't. I was born in a small town in the mid-west. I joined the army when I was eighteen. I was promoted from there. I still visit my mother every Christmas I'm on leave. I couldn't possibly understand. All I can do is do my best to help him. That's… That's what I've been trying to do all along"

"Just… Look after him."

"I promise."


	15. Epilogue

**This is, I'm sad to say, the final chapter of Welcome to the Team. This chapter is composed of four short stories that, in my opinion, tie up most of the loose ends.**

**Meet the Ringtails**

"Wha' oo think?" Rico asked as they entered the HQ. Skipper looked around. The team had certainly done a lot of remodelling.

"Good job, Rico. Where's the coffee machine? I haven't had a decent cup of Joe in a couple of months." Skipper asked. Kowalski looked down at his feet.

"I… blew it up, sir." He replied. Kowalski flinched as Skipper raised his flipper to slap him. Suddenly the fishbowl entrance opened and three lemurs landed on the floor across from Skipper.

"Hello again bossy one and throwy-uppy one!" The tallest announced. He turned to Private and Kowalski, "I am King Julian XIII, your king. Feel free to bask in my amazingness."

"Oh tinned sardines, not you!" Skipper moaned.

* * *

"What's so bad about Julian, Skippah?" Private asked, "He's a little arrogant, but perfectly harmless."

"'armless!" Rico shouted proceeding with a stream of incomprehensible monosyllables. Private took a few steps back. Skipper put a hand on Rico's shoulder, calming him down.

"Private, his plan of attack is never obvious. No, he wears you down over time. Slowly, painfully slowly, breaks you. Men, I have fought some of the…"

"Skipper, don't you think that might be slightly… exaggerating?" Kowalski interrupted.

"Oh no. Me and Rico remember him from Madagascar, that lawless hellhole." Rico nodded knowingly, "That ringtail never stops partying."

"'ot me 'ooked on Re' Lychees." Rico added grimly.

"Surely he must sleep some time?" Private asked. Skipper shook his head.

"He never sleeps, Private. NEVER SLEEPS!" Skipper screamed. Kowalski began to write on his clipboard.

"Skipper, technically, that's impossible!" Kowalski objected.

"Who told you that?" Skipper asked.

"Science."

"Then science is wrong."

"It can't be as bad as all that." Private asked.

"Wait and see, young Private. Wait and see."

* * *

It was one in the morning and the penguins were still awake, though through no fault of their own. Music blasted from the habitat next door and flashing disco lights glittered on the water.

"Skipper, surely there is some way to block out that horrible music." Private moaned.

"So you admit I was right." Skipper smirked.

"Well…"

"Private?"

"Yes you were right Skipper. Perhaps if we just asked them nicely…"

"We can't show the enemy any form of weakness, young Private," Skipper objected.

"I don't suppose we could join the party?" Kowalski asked. Skipper marched over glaring at him.

"Did you just suggest that I allow my team to be corrupted by that, angry word that I won't in front of Private, lemur?"

"No sir." Kowalski squeaked.

"Rico, earmuffs times four." Skipper ordered. Rico regurgitated several seemingly random objects, at least three quarters of which were deadly. He shook his head.

"All out." Rico replied.

"Well that's just dandy."

* * *

**Home Sweet Home**

"We have a new mission, men," Skipper announced, "One of our best agents, code named 'take me to the ball game' real name Rhonda is working for the enemy. We've been assigned to track her down and bring her in for interrogation. According to the intelligence that Kowalski conveniently added to the computer systems, she's in the town of New Sea lion."

"Skippah, that's…!"

"Yes, Private, that's twenty miles from Salmonburg, your home town."

* * *

Skippah drove the commandeered jeep into the town. As he passed, children were pulled in from the sidewalk by their mothers and, doors and windows shut and bolted.

"Do the folks in your town always act like this?" Skipper asked. Private suddenly decided that the dashboard was in urgent need of inspection.

"No, it's the fact that we're military that scared them off." Private replied.

"I don't see how that's a problem." Skipper replied.

" Well, the last time a military vehicle came to town, it was to take me away. Everyone's afraid it will happen to their kids." Private replied.

"I told you we should have come as civilians, sir." Kowalski added.

"Not helping, Kowalski. Private, which house did you say was yours?" Skipper asked. Private pointed to a neat clapboard house about three doors down.

"That one, Skippah." Skipper pulled over in front of the house, and climbed out of the car. He could see the neighbours watching them cautiously, ducking out of sight whenever the team looked their way. Skipper knocked on the door. Nobody answered.

"Mrs Nelson, your son Percival is here to see you." Skipper shouted. There were footsteps inside the house. The door opened a crack and a female penguin could be seen inside.

"What do you want? Haven't you already done enough?" She spat. Private rushed to the front of the group.

"Mummy, I'm home!" Private shouted. The door was open and Private rushed into his mother's arms.

"Percy, I was so worried… I thought I would never see you again." She chocked through tears of joy.

"That would have been true if it hadn't been for Skippah." Private replied happily. Mrs Nelson looked up at the team's leader.

"Ma'am." Skipper greeted. Mrs Nelson held Private protectively.

"Thank you Mr…?"

"Skipper, ma'am. My real name is classified. This is Kowalski, my lieutenant, and this is Rico, my weapons specialist," Skipper introduced the members of his team.

"Ma'am."

"'aa'm." Private looked up at his mother.

"Um… Would you stay for dinner?" Mrs Nelson asked.

"I appreciate you asking, ma'am, but I think you and Priva… Percival might need some time to…" Skipper replied.

"Do come to dinner, Skippah." Private pleaded. Skipper smiled. It had been so long since he had seen the kid this happy. In fact, he had never seen Private smile for more than a few seconds.

* * *

The team was helping Mrs Nelson prepare dinner, when the door opened and Private's father entered.

"Mary, I'm home." He called.

"Daddy!" Private came running out of the kitchen, "Daddy, I'm so glad to…"

"What are you doing here?" Private's father demanded, "Is this some kind of trick?" Private stopped in his tracks.

"I'm on unofficial leave, father." Private replied nervously. His father certainly didn't seem pleased to see him.

"Private? Everything okay?" Skipper asked, poking his head out of the kitchen, "Oh, hello Mr Nelson."

"Get out, all of you!" Private's father shouted.

"Dad?" Private asked on the verge of tears.

"You heard me, get out. I won't have you military people messing up my town."

"Aren't you pleased to see your son, Mr Nelson?" Skipper asked.

"I would be if it wasn't some trick!" Private's father shouted.

"Henry!" Private's mother objected.

"Send them out, Mary, or so help me I'll…" Mr Nelson left the threat up to the imagination of the others in the room, though this was probably because he couldn't think of one. He certainly couldn't beat any one of them in a fight. Rico growled. Skipper was sorely tempted to let him have his way.

"Come on, Private." Skipper walked towards the door, the team following.

"See, they've even gave him a rank!" Henry Nelson accused. His wife rushed past and opened the door for the team, then followed them outside.

"I'm so sorry, Percy," she cried, "Your father has an election coming up and…"

"I understand, mommy, he would rather be mayor than spend time with me." Private replied bitterly. Skipper was once again tempted to let Rico lose on the man.

"It's not that, it's just… he's afraid, ever since they took you away," She gave her son one last hug, "Goodbye Percy."

"Bye, mum." Private climbed into the jeep. Kowalski began to drive away. Skipper wrapped a comforting arm around the younger boy.

"Chin up, soldier."

* * *

**So Close, and Yet So Far**

Rico had been staring at the photograph for at least half an hour. He and Manfridi had secretly taken it when Skipper wasn't looking. No photographs of any member of the team, except those in their files were allowed, for security reasons. It had originally been a joke, but he'd carried the photograph with him ever since. The image showed Skipper sitting on one of the walls in the old fort, watching the sergeant drill the reserve troops, a satisfied smile on his face.

"I'm guessing that's why you spared him." Rico whirled around to face the speaker, hiding the photograph behind his back, "You love him, don't you?"

"'ow oo know?" Rico asked suspiciously.

"Rico, you don't need to know how to make antimatter, which I do, to work out what's bothering you." Kowalski replied.

"Don't 'ell 'ipper." Rico threatened, regurgitating his favourite flamethrower.

"Don't worry, Rico, I won't," Rico swallowed the flamethrower and sat down at the table, his head in his hands, "Rico, I promise I'm not going to tell." Rico shook his head.

"No' that."

"What's wrong, then? I'm not going to tell him, but if he sees you moping about like that he's going to work it out."

"oo no' understand." Kowalski looked at his teammate.

"You're afraid he doesn't feel the same way?"

"'ow oo guess?" Rico asked, once again suspicious.

"Well there was a 78% probability it was that." Rico swallowed the photograph.

"'ell, oo can dream." He sighed. Kowalski thought for a moment.

"Y'know, according to Private, Skipper's broken the photograph rule himself. Apparently he keeps two photographs with him wherever he goes. One is of the old team, and the other is the photograph of you that went missing from your file."

"Oo mean…"

"I didn't say anything." Kowalski replied mysteriously climbing up the ladder and out of the fishbowl entrance.

**Revenge**

_"Sir, the head of Department X is here. Sir?" The aid knocked on the door of Mason's office. There was no answer. He opened the door, "Sir?" Mason was slumped on his desk. The aid assumed he was asleep and shook his shoulder to wake him up, but drew his hand away almost immediately. His hand was wet with blood, "Oh my tuna…!"_

"So that's what the guy says happened. Security cameras confirm it." Rockgut reported. The other three officers nodded.

"And why did you insist that Agent Nigel not be present? You may have caused a major diplomatic incident," Commander Hannay asked, "PMI 6 doesn't like being kept in the dark."

"Because Nigel's a suspect." Rockgut replied.

"Preposterous!" Col. Lacy objected.

"What possible reason could Nigel have for killing Mason?" Agent Michaels asked.

"Revenge," Rockgut answered bluntly, "Mason abducted and tortured his nephew."

"Are there any other suspects?" Lacy asked.

"Any other suspects? Are you joking? Mason had almost as many enemies as I do." Hannay snorted.

"We can narrow it down to eight, though." Lacy added.

"How? They've all got the motive?" Rockgut asked.

"Means. How many people can get past all those guards, then kill him without anyone noticing and hate Mason?" Lacy replied.

"Apart from us, Nigel, RLEA-2 prototype, RLEA-1…" Michaels listed.

"For candied anchovies sake, don't use those names." Rockgut interrupted.

"As you wish. Skipper, Rico, Kowalski, Skipper's Private, Blowhole, Nigel, Rhonda, and Clemson."

"Well, we can rule out Skipper's new Private and Clemson," Rockgut shuffled through the files in front of him, "Private despises violence, and refuses to kill even if it endangers his own life. Clemson is too busy going after Julian to bother with Mason."

"So what's our course of action?" Michaels asked.

"We do nothing. Close the file," Rockgut ordered, "On the record, I'd tell you that our resources are spread too spread out for comfort. We can't afford to send out our best agents to go looking for even better ones. Off the record, I'd say Mason got what was coming to him. If the killer were in this room, I'd salute him."

The End


End file.
